There's 5 things I do
- Go to the gym, the stress relief of lifting heavy objects is strangely soothing for me.
- Meditate. Yes, it sounds stupid and pointless, but a quiet room and 5-10 minutes out can help a huge deal with stress/anger
- Get with some mates and do something stupid. Not kidding, just a social interaction can help massively with a bad mood.
- Take a step back, and look at what I've done, what I'm doing and how I can do it better. I give myself constructive criticism all the time, and I find it actually helps me a lot.
- Get buried in something. Music, a book, a game, something that I can escape and get a reset. Similar to meditation.
Hope either of those help. Self harm isn't a good thing, in any way, so find a way to get the emotions out in a more constructive and beneficial way. Just remember, self destruction isn't good for the people around you.
Tell the people who've back stabbed you to go jump off a cliff, debate leaving disco for a bit, then join a cool faction. Personal experience.
Memelocke aside however, Have you tried introducing your boys to any games they might like to play with you? My brother is has high functioning autism as well and his biggest problem is just feeling like he belongs. If you can bond with them over a game you have fun while teaching your boys and they learn things from you and bond better with you. Very recently I started introducing my brother to my friends and playing games with him and it worked loads for his happiness levels. I wish you luck in your hard times, I have no advice for the dog it would kill me if my fur baby died on me. Best wishes.