So like one hour ago I was like WHOA! WHOOOAAA! AMIGO GUKEL IS IN HAAAM-*hic*-BUUURG! And whoa the first second I like see he's there he's like "VIVA MY SISTER! COME ON IN, I'M SHOOTING DUCKS! IN A POND!"
And I was like WHOA DUDE REALLY? REALLY BRO? AMIGO I'M COMING! But wait... I'm not your sister! So then I was like confused but it's okay, no problemo, ENN PEE like we say, and I went there but I think one of the ducks was a Rheinland Military dude... duck... thing... somethin', I don't care, it hit him and his ship exploded. It looked pretty, but it must've sucked balls comradesh, totally must've! Anyway man I tell you things went kind of weird from there. Crap actually maybe it went a totally different way, I don't remember... I should drink more, it might help! But okay. OKAY. FIIINE LET'S GO ON.
So like I was totally there and then those ducks... no wait Military ducks... fellas... officers? WHOOO CAAARES! They were shooting me, and I was shooting them, and they weren't hitting, and I was like all chill and jazz and then yeah like one of our comrades... Dude McGuy... no wait I think his name was Hans... Obermann Hans something? I don't know man but we were like there and then we like made a Fafnir-duck or somethin' run. Then a Wrath or somethin'. Then at some point comrade Lenin came... my memory's fuzzy... it sucks...
Oh yeah there was this one green dude... duck... man I don't know I should stop getting so drunk... no wait I shoul... bah I DON'T KNOW! BUUUT! Okay so like this one dude-uck was like getting new ships over and over! He exploded! THREE TIMES! SOOO AWESOME MAN! SO AWESOME!
But it's cool because then later Lenin, Vladdie my homeboy, my amigo, hermano, THE MAN totally I swear, he like dueled one of them Admirals of the Military, that Putzkammer dude... chick... duck man, let's leave it at duck, oh and it was awesome because he toasted his, her, well ITS duck-mobile man I swear, and Hans was like DUDE oh man HANS WAS ON FIRE MAN, all the time! I mean our Hans... okay. Anyway I swear he couldn't stop doing the pew-pew! YEAH! It was like TOOOTALLY SICKNASTY! But it's cool because he was like dueling too and then he built an... explosion or something I don't know, I was on my way back then.
But then I was like at Vogtland and I hit the auto-driver... no pilot, auto-pilot thing and suddenly BAM SIRENS EVERYWHERE RED ALERT THE RUSSIANS ARE COMING OH MY GOD!
Well no but like the stupid thing had a failure and I crashlanded with my bird on the hangaaa...haaa...-*hic*-...deck. Thing. WHATEVER, IT FREAKIN' HURT! Oh and yeah so like my bird's kind of... damaged... and I kinda... I don't know the Chief dude like said Ja Ja, Nein Nein, no way to get them parts for that thing real quick and you're without a ship and I was like DUDE WHAT THE FFFfff- and he hit me on the head. No wait, I think I got hit on the head way earlier when I crashed. Crap, I don't remember but now I'm without a working bird and getting drunk.
Speaking of getting drunk! HEY HESSLER! ADDIE! GET YOUR ARSE DOWN HERE AND LET'S PLAY POKER YOU SLUT! YOU STILL OWE ME HUNDRED CREDS FROM THE LAST TIME YOU B-