Isn't that a little drastic? I STILL have no definite answers on what kind of information he could have possibly achieved. Help me out, and maybe you won't have to ground me like I'm a five year old child. Because God help me, I have implemented a password on my PDA. I need to connect with my subdermal link cable to access it. There are BIOMETRICS. He can't just steal information to his heart's content.

I want you to tell me exactly what he knows. We can work this out. Let me help you.

Besides. I really don't want to be stuck in here forever.

Hello. Sorry for being off the airwaves, I've taken a while to part with my stress by being around people, as far away as possible from isolation. I've also been scrounging around various tech shops and bazaars and even persuaded some disgruntled former DHC employees to part with enough odds and ends to string together something for a little pet project I'd like to work on... but that's for another time. I think you might like the end result. An entire personality matrix is nothing to scoff at! I mean, if it works, that is. And yes, I understand Levan is... jumping to conclusions very quickly. I've been trying to tell him a couple of times that you're not a space warlock, but he just wouldn't listen.

But fine. I'll be on my way eventually. Though I wonder what the urgency is for.

I am utterly despondent. Harbinger gave me the one answer I was not hoping for.

This changes everything. I've been turned into a new Vincent, by accident.

I don't even know what to say. But I am... terribly shook by this. And I want to clear my head.

Look. I don't... know how else I'm supposed to say this. Where do I even begin with you? I held this in my chest for so long, I don't even know how I should start with this.

I know you want to keep your people close. I know thoughts of "betrayal" are all over your mind. I know how much these "outsiders" hurt you over and over again. And I know how I've sworn an oath - which is what makes the rest of this even harder.

But I-- I really think I've reached my limit here. I can only stay behind your paranoid tendencies for so long, like how I can change my mind about you so many times. One day, you're the nicest, strangest woman this side of Sirius. And the next, you are a venom spitting spider who hates and spites.

I've been with you, through thin and fucking thin. We've seen so many things. Hell, I've been long enough to see Hunt and Vincent. But there is a LIMIT to how much I can put up with. And I really, really really think I've reached that limit the moment I tried to end my own life. That was my wake-up call. It went something like: "Kristoff, you've ruined your life. Stop doing what you're doing. Be happy."

You just can't help but lecture me at any given time, about literally anything? It's always "Don't talk to this outsider, Lazurith", or how about "Stop doing what you think is right"? You ALWAYS want me to do what YOU want, all because you are just so afraid of losing me like you lost V, and you're terrified I'll end up turning into the abominable, lying corpse zombie freak he has become. If you're hoping to find a soldier's resolve in me, you are dead wrong.

By the way, do you even have any idea what it's like to live under your shadow? Every spacer I've come across associates me with the things you did, and every time I want to get someone else's unbiased opinion opinion about something, you are always there to whisper "No, you are wrong, what are you, a traitor?" in my ear. Like a dog owner pulling on the damn leash!

To some... ridiculous cosmic joke. To a divine intervention, if you will, I've been spared from a laser bolt to my brain. And I am not about to waste my third-- no fourth, maybe even fifth damn chance at life being with you, lying to myself about how being right behind you is the only good thing in existence, and how the rest of Sirius is flawed and wrong.

You've kidnapped me from Ames when I could have had a normal recovery, for God's sakes, why the fuck would you do something so messed up to someone who's been close to you for so long?! Why! Because I haven't shed as many tears as you did over Imogen? IS THAT IT?! Guilt consumed me, fuck, even now it hurts! I couldn't do zilch for her, nada, nothing at all! And one day she just goes, like with the snap of a fucking finger. I find myself oftentimes still in tears over her.

And you somehow still have the audacity to claim I never give a shit. Just how dare you say that? Oh, wait, it's because I'm a new key now, so I've become your extra, top one priority in your life! Isn't it?!

Or wait, let me guess, is it because you think I'm a filthy betraying backstabbing snake like everyone else? Just how fucking messed up do you have to be to say these things without thinking of how the person on the receiving end of your insults might feel? A person that, might I add, has been at your side for so very long. Did that thought ever cross your mind?

[There was a long pause, after he had raised his cracking voice to the point of tears, he breathed in, before resuming the message in a quieter tone.]

For what it's worth, I'm grateful for all you did for me. But you've crossed the line a long time ago, and I have continuously put this weight aside because I care. But it seems that you couldn't care less. Even while under their microscope.

You know what - fuck this. I am done watching myself wither away. I am done being your personal spy. I am done being compared to Caliban, or to a street thug, or to be called weak and pathetic because I can't mentally repel a Nomad elder trying to skullfuck my mind. I need time, from you.

I'm done. Don't look for me.