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OSN | Hedonist Kid Kills Bountied Pirate Legend - Printable Version

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OSN | Hedonist Kid Kills Bountied Pirate Legend - MiniKitty - 08-03-2023


ORBITAL SPA & NEWS


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Hedonist Kid Kills Bountied Pirate Legend
ZURICH - In the Sirian Standard Time night from the August 1st to the 2nd, one young very lucky client took over the control of the cockpit of the OSC-Ladykiller, the famous VIP Dorado Ferry from the Moneyshot Holo Entertainment Studios. His mission: Surviving the hated pirate and ex-Unioner Valentin Rahm. Unfortunately for Rahm, this proved to be his final act of piracy, as Lucky Number Seven winner Levan Harlow ended this man's whole career, while cashing in a juicy bounty of nothing less than 300.000.000 Credits!


LUCKY NUMBER SEVEN - Little did the soon-to-be-rich hero Levan Harlow know when he, by pure chance, won the Lucky Number Seven jackpot, sponsored by the charismatic Orbital Captain Faraday Reste, that he was going to have the wildest night of his life! The 19yo boy from Freeport 14 would not only get to sleep in the finest hotels of Curacao and Gallia, but also be in the company of the OSC "Lucky Number Seven" - the sirius-wide known erotic actresses of his generation, known for highest profile escort services and spectacular performances. Truly, it was certain that there was no perverted wish unfulfilled during this night for the young lucky winner.

[Image: 0yBuqdz.png]
The highly attractive Levan Harlow
Pirate Hunter and hero of OSC

(NNStaGram Profile Picture)
Aiming for the wonderful OSC private resort on Planet Blois in the Gallic Orleanais, the home of debauchery known as the OSC-Ladykiller embarked on an exotic journey from Cortez to Gallia using the Zurich bridge. When suddenly a small asteroid hit the lust-filled Ferry, tossing it out of the trade lane, pirate lord Valentin Rahm jumped in to ambush the seemingly damaged OSC vessel. Little did he know, our Dorado-class Ferry is among the most secure ships in Sirius and Gallia: The Ladykiller's shield held. However, Rahm's sneak attack knocked out the pilot of the Ladykiller, leaving the ship uncontrolled for two minutes until the lucky kid heroically jumped in to save the day. Already covered in love bites and certainly more than motivated to keep this party trip going, the as "hung twink" described boy from the freeport took the pilot seat and quickly let the engines run hot, luring Rahm closer to the Zurich star in the Bern field.

Spectacularly using the bright light to his advantage, the stamina-rich kid used all of his tricks to surprise Rahm wherever possible. Guncam footage showed the a fascinating mine-drop trap near a bigger asteroid, causing Rahm to get surprised by the stationary warheads as his Unioner fighter took a turn around the rock, losing his shields in the process. Gracefully dodging most of the pirate's shots, Levan fired all weapons systems at the same time, non-stop, resulting in mines swarming left and right, counter-measures confusing the pirate's sensors while Maxim rounds pierced the wings of the otherwise dangerous pirate ship.

As seen in the published footage, the Ladykiller piloted by Harlow used irregular moves, seemingly unpredictable in nature, do avoid the green plasma fire shot at our seductive elite from Curacao. The heated dogfight climaxed as both ships headed directly for each other, and Levan went for the moneyshot, squirting Purple Goddess shots all over the pirate's snub, melting it at high speed. Cheering can be heard from our women as they embrace our barely clothed hero, cover him with kiss-shaped lipstick stains and kept on giving, like he did. Truly, the 300.000.000 Credits bounty was not the only reward the seemingly innocent young man would receive for being in the right place at the right time.


PARTY ALL NIGHT - After all this action, the party did not stop in any sense. The OSC-Ladykiller continued on her journey to Blois and arrived not much later. There, both the Curacaoan "Lucky Number Seven" as well as the Gallic "chiffre sept" made it their goal to fulfill every desire the lucky hero could ever have. From an absolute nobody to a pirate hunter, womanizer and hero in just one night - OSN certainly wishes the best of luck for our new wonderful celebrity and hopes to get to report more riveting tales of Levan Harlow!

That is, if our ladies let the man leave the bedroom... ?


Amanda Grace, OSN Reporter

OSN maintains the right to moderate any and all comments left on this article. Any comments that are found suspicious or dangerous will be forwarded to the relevant security forces out of an abundance of caution.





RE: OSN | Hedonist Kid Kills Bountied Pirate Legend - Jayce - 08-03-2023


#. Yosh1ko
08/3/830 09:14

That's my boy! Slayyy!
69 4




RE: OSN | Hedonist Kid Kills Bountied Pirate Legend - Lord Helmchen - 08-03-2023


#. Caitlyn Cross
04/27/830 17:00

Hello, I am The Chairwoman of Orbital Spa and Cruise and I Approve this News Article. I also would Like to Discuss a Job Offer with the Author of this Article.

Keep up the Good Work.

positive votes negative votes




RE: OSN | Hedonist Kid Kills Bountied Pirate Legend - Antonio - 08-03-2023


#. bhg_john22
08/3/830 19:46

The guy comes in, does my job better than me, gets all the women, and can freely sail into the sunset. I give up.
126 35




RE: OSN | Hedonist Kid Kills Bountied Pirate Legend - Reeves - 08-03-2023


#. Lovingly Xenophobic
08/04/830 19:53

[This has been removed due to politically inappropriate content. For more information, please refer to our terms and conditions located here.]
59 441k




RE: OSN | Hedonist Kid Kills Bountied Pirate Legend - Amy West - 08-03-2023


#. OfficialAmyWest
08/04/830 20:15

Doesn't look all that attractive to me. Maybe peoples' standards are just nosediving these days.
37 141




RE: OSN | Hedonist Kid Kills Bountied Pirate Legend - AuruemSaber - 08-03-2023


#. NobeokaBrawler
08/04/830 21:40

Three hundred million...

Three f*cking hundred.

For a pirate Lev of all bloody people took down while going on a bloody bender.

I'd be proud if I wasn't so damn jealous.

Lucky little sh*te
19 8




RE: OSN | Hedonist Kid Kills Bountied Pirate Legend - monmarfori - 08-03-2023


#. DeLuca
08/04/830 22:14

Right. What do we have here? Does the Legión Maltesa care about fancy stuff nowadays?
155 35




RE: OSN | Hedonist Kid Kills Bountied Pirate Legend - Petitioner - 08-05-2023


8. pharmanon
08/05/830 21:05

Mrowl. Sounds like he deserves everything he got, and then some. Here's hoping he swings by one of my routes soon.
460 29




RE: OSN | Hedonist Kid Kills Bountied Pirate Legend - Geno - 08-05-2023


9. techie804
08/05/830 22:02

@pharmanon bet you just want to nab some of that blood money for yourself you greedy wench. hands off
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