I normally hate feedback threads, but I gotta jump sometime

[Marburg]

OK, for almost two years now, I've always talked myself out of making a self-serving ego driven feedback thread for the stuff I write.

But, why not now?...feedback may help me improve in the spots that aren't glaringly obvious to me already.

There's too much stuff in too many places to locate & link 'em all here (besides, I wouldn't wanna expose all the uber crap from the beginning anyway)

So...for those that wanna take the time, this is the most recent culmination of what I've been developing in my head. ...& besides pointing out structure flaws (which i'll improve on the more I practice) I could use some outside opinions on my ability so far to convey my ideas.

The Green Hell Beergarden

Go on. Let me have it, & don't hold back

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[Marburg]

::bump for the night crew::

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[Caribe]

I actually enjoyed reading that. I feel as if I'm there. However the characters seem a bit blurry. In other words you described the surroundings and ambient well however I can't really see a difference between the characters by their appearance. It's kind of like the clones from starwars they all look the same but have different personalities and age.

Hey you wanted criticizim, you got it.

My three cents.

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Been here since Discovery 4.77 (lurk mode engaged)

I have recently met and discussed with Atalawohisdi the trader that flies the Caribe. Just so everyone knows, I engaged in Sigma 13. He flies through half the system before going back to New Berlin, where he cruises from one side of the system to the other, hugging the sun as close as he can. All the while, he flies near Battleships trying to scrape me off. I finally send out the white flag, and move back to Sigma 13. However, it was a ruse, and he bit. Knowing his trade route, I interdicted the trade lane and the chase began anew. It ended, an hour after it began, with me retreating, out of Countermeasures and getting very irritated.

He kept boasting how he has never been caught; I'd like to see him beat until he begs to pay, then beaten some more.

- Best day ever.

[pipboy]

YOU SUCK!! HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE!! Your RP is bad, you are evil! Your mother is a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! [/typical feedback post]

Now, that's out of the way.

You guys are doing great, love RP'ing with you. Didn't read your link, mostly cause I'm just not in a reading mood at the moment. Only thing I can complain about is that I don't RP with you, my oh so nice allies, enough. I hope to change that soon.

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[DeathsOverture]

Marburg - you already know how I feel about your writing. :nyam:

Damien has so much dimension. Your RP posts with him are epic.

PlagueDog ftw

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