LGNS: Gallia perfects WMD!

[Liberated Gallia]

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	744 AGS - Devastating weapon developed by The Gallic Navy!
	744 AGS - The King returns in full health! Starts a fastfood baguette franchise!
	744 AGS - César movie awards dominated by the epic movie Saving soldat Hugh J'anus.
	744 AGS - In a Brutal strike in Lorraine The Maquis detonated a large Cheese factory. There was nothing left but de Brie.
	744 AGS - Many a smuggler keep asking themselves "Can I take over Gallia one day?" The answer often is "Of Corsican!" as Unione Corse is on the rise.

Devastating new hybrid Gallic Navy weapon capable of wiping out entire systems uncovered!

LORRAINE, 01.04.744 AGS - For many years The Gallic Free Press just couldn't decypher why would Gallia just hand The Versailles Station in the heart of the vital Ille-De-France into the hands of a foreign company - The Interspace Commerce. What does this mean? Why would the ex-royalists and The Gallic Union let Liberty itself have such a stronghold in their heartland?? It just didn't add up. Luckily there is Liberated Gallia - the only truly independent and unbiased news outlet in the region,and our investigative reporters might have finally cracked the case. For many months we have monitored The Versailles Station, disguised as civilian contractors. And it appears the entire station is simply a front for a military scheme so sinister that it would put The Glassing of Leeds to shame and seem like child's play. Most of the base has extreme security, civilian clothing secret agents zig zag every inch of the station. our investigators recognised many faces from the GNI and GSB, and several weeks ago even the cleverly disguised director himself - Antonin de Lasagna'on. What is The Union cooking up with The Libertonian company you might ask? For that we need move to our Edinburgh correspondent - Pierre La'Grand'Scoop. "We have interviewed a freedom fighter who stumpled upon a terrifying weapons test, and shared what he has seen - an unholy hybrid of Alien, Gallic Union and Libertarian technology" - The Liberated Gallia labs have confirmed the authenticity of the visual evidence. The freedom fighter couldn't put two and two together, or why his ship was so swiftly and devastatingly disabled, and why was the weapon escorted by multiple Gallic Navy armed to the teeth escorts. It was on the Liberated Gallia to uncover and connect the seemingly unrelated events - and we can confirm that this clearly is the result of what has been going on The Versailles Station. The Gallic Union, by combining alien power cells, and seemigly harmless commodities provided by Interspace Commerce's shady division agents has developed a weapon capable of wiping out entire systems swiftly. The "DL 9000" Galactic Donut Launcher. This weapon puts the Warwolf to shame, and shows just how sinister The Gallic Union really is. We urge our readers to stay safe out there. Stay tuned for more investigative breaking reveals brought to you by The Liberated Gallia investigative press.

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001. [b]UserName[/b]
[i]01  April 744 AGS 69:69[/i]

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OORP - Credit and idea to @Groshyr for BB code, @jammi who's comment template we stole from Hispania Imperial thread and @Colony News Service for inspiration

[Groshyr]

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001. GastonCorbeil714@email.ga
01 April 744 AGS 12:19 PM

So you are the "free" press of the "liberated" Gallia. From what? Free from brains and liberated from cognition? References to lasagna, donut weapons... What next? Public defecation on a square as a symbol of resistance against authoritarian regime asking to do it in toilets?

If this was some sort of joke - it was misguided: no context, direct references without puns, exaggeration without seriousness. A monkey could do better. If this is the true level of the "free Gallia press", then I wish the Kusarians had won so that I cannot be ashamed of my own countrymen. Mieux vaut être seul que mal accompagné.

↑ 4973 ↓ 37

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[Lemon]

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002. John Freedom
01 April 828 Real Time 11:11

I myself prefer Vanilla Donuts - what even is this "Gallia" supposed to be?

↑7 ↓1492

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[Thunderer]

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003. ColourfulFlower
01 April 744 AGS 11:01

I liked the article about the movie better. And it was a crap movie.

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004. Pun-sexual
01 April 744 AGS 11:02

Doesn't Liberated Gallia want more Liberty?

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Bretonian Treaty Database Bretonian Armed Forces Recruitment Center
Bretonian Charter of Interstellar Law Bretonian Secrets Act

[Charo]

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005. xXYour-QueenXx
01 April 744 AGS 1:26PM

I fucking knew it

↑ 1 ↓ 2709

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[Chuba]

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006. Ivan_60(Co)
01 April 744 AGS 1:40PM

che?

↑ 1 ↓ 2710

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[Kauket]

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007. Revenant
01 April 744 AGS 2:00 PM

We won the Nomad War for this shit to be on top trending.

↑ 367,372 ↓ 228,346

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