Amaranth feedback

[stardust47]

Read it here. It's for my Nomad Trial character, Amaranth. Please at least try to find the good bits.

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[Tomtomrawr]

There is very little detail in it. Why did she head to Freeport 4? Where was she actually when she had the dream? What made her so special as to have the dream?

Work on giving more details, readers love details.

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[17:45:39] Wolfs Ghost (Murphy): Tom, you have problems. Go kill yourself.
[19:25:12] Johnny (Jam): Tomtom, I will beat you with a spoon.
[14:22:56] Prarabdh Thakur: KILL HIM WITH A SHEEP.
[17:40:48] Eagle (Junes): Tom should be slapped with a spoon.
[11:32:18] Warspite: Thank you for being so awesome Tom. <3
[18:17:36] Metano: I love you tomtom
[20:06:24] Warspite: I will seriously give you epic head.

Edit: also, Tomtomrawr, fappin' like a boss.