In the messy, old, donut encrusted "archive" (floor) of the LPI office, there lies a tape from recruitment past. Perhaps a tape from recruitment future as well, but there certainly lies the tape from when Larry Morrison first applied to the LPI.
Quote:Larry Morrison sat outside the door into the LPI recruitment office, sweaty as ever. Just walking in there had made him nervous, and he needed time to recover his wits.
"Alright, Larry, you can do this. Remember what Pa said, confidence, confidence, confidence..."
Larry held his breath, and opened the door. No one was awake, which made him a little nervous. Then again, Larry was ALWAYS nervous, and he crept forward to what looked like a stack of blank resumes. He got a little more nervous when the first pile he came too wasn't the right one, and scarfed down one of his "emergency comfort food rations" to keep control.
"Easy there, it's gotta be around here somewhere oh what am I playing at I'm not worth anything NO! I am confident. Yep, I am confident. Hey, donuts and NO! Might be important to them, don't want to mess up already, I still have two in my pocket... here we are..."
Larry snatched up the correct form, and left to the relative safety of outside the office. With a deep breath in his lungs, hope and anxiety in his heart, and a fresh donut in his stomach, he began to fill it out.
"One: Do you like donuts... hmm, I wonder if I can spell out 'yes' in crumbs... that is pretty cool. Good job Larry, only *gulp* seven more to go.... Two: Do I like coffee... I think so, but it really depends on the donut... oh man I wish I had some to go along with this right now I'm so far from home and it's scary and focus, Larry, focus. Okay, Three: Do I like paperwork. Yes, as long as I don't need to think about it, it keeps me distracted from all the scary things and thinking and nasty people who will probably maul me and I'm not cut out for this job and CONFIDENCE. I have CONFIDENCE. Okay, Four: Do I have flight experience. Oh man, I knew I should of taken some classes, they probably won't accept me what am I gonna do Larry, you are CONFIDENT. Say it again, confident confident confident confident. Okay, Five: What is the pay I expect... I don't really care, just give me a job aw I probably won't get it there's gotta be someone better and I am Larry, the confident one. Just keep saying that, it might come true. Okay, Six: What hours... well, I can help out a lot until Monday, then I go on tour with people for a few weeks, I don't want to but they pressured me into it and I might be able to get some work in on the occasional Wednesday... Seven: Patriots? Like the sports team? Oh shoot, that's probably some terminology I should know, oh man I don't know anything and nobody probably cares and OH! Patriots are those fighters... yeah, I could fly one, as long as it has a readily available ejection seat. *gulp* I guess... Eight: Disgruntled? More nervous I would think, but if they want me to be disgruntled I can be disgruntled, I just want a job aw they probably won't take it CONFIDENCE, LARRY. See? That's all of them... okay, all I have to do is just throw this on the pile and I'm done..."
Another paper is found in the much more orderly Detective office, detailing Larry's application to the more radical, effective part of the LPI.
Quote:Multiple Choice: Please choose the best response.
1. The following are contraband except
A. Cardamine B. Light Arms
C. Artifacts
D. Counterfeit Software
In my opinion this is hogwash, as the guns kill more than the counterfeit code, and fund more terrorist groups; nevertheless, its the rules, no point in arguing.
2. LPI are
A. Never allowed into Zone 21
B. Able to enter Zone 21 if chasing a fugitive/suspect C. Able to enter Zone 21 if given permission from the LSF Director or SA fleet admirals
D. Always allowed into Zone 21
Not that I'd really want to, I've heard tales of aliens and terrorists running rampant there. That's the Navy's job, but if necessary and allowed, I can muscle past my fear. Hopefully.
3. The following are considered Violent Crimes except (hint: check the Penal Code)
A. Kidnapping
B. Murder
C. Piracy D. Battery
Keeping in mind that any 'battering' of myself or someone I like might merit some 'battering' in response... nothing illegal, thought...
4. In the course of a murder investigation, the first thing you do is
A. Interview the witnesses
B. Review the MEs (medical examiner) results on the autopsy C. Search the scene of the crime for clues
D. Wait for the forensics to come in
Get all I can while the blood's still hot. It gives the witnesses some time to recover their wits, too. Makes for better testimonies, more hints.
5. How many LPI flatfoots does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A. One
B. However many it takes to realize the lightbulb is not a donut
C. Nobody knows the janitor always screws it in D. If they could lift up their arms, it would be one
See, the regulars have no work ethic. I came from a background of having to work hard at myself to keep going, and strangely, the LPI has helped that mature.
Short Response fill in the blanks, do not go over three lines
6. Why do you want to be a detective?
Frankly, I'm sick of the regular job. We get no respect, nor do we deserve it. The 'flatfoots' are pathetic, barely able to take on the Xenos in Starfleas. They have no work ethic, few ethics in general, and I'll be damned if I couldn't find a handful addicted to Cardamine within a good half hour of searching. When I joined the LPI, I thought I was going to be part of something greater. That thought carried me, made me a solid person for the first time in my life. And now its time to use what I've learned, and really BE part of something greater.
7. What is your opinion of the regular LPI officers?
Please, don't get me started. I let some of it slip in the previous question, and that's just the tip of the iceberg. They're useless. Absolutely useless. That last question on the multiple choice is testament to that, as is our reputation among the people as 'easily bribed' and 'better off munching donuts in peace'. The Navy think we're worthless, and most days I'm inclined to agree with that. I'm sick of it, and want to do something. That's why I'm here, right?
8. What is your preferred sidearm? (note: this will not affect what you are given)
Something not filled with epoxy. I've read over the LPI field manual, and its no joke. If I'm to get a REAL weapon, I'm fine. As far as a model though, I'm no guns expert, but... something sleek, and dangerous looking. The kind of gun that scares people into submission without a shot being fired. And concealable too. Black, if possible.
9. List the methods of interrogation you know.
The best way to get tongues to loosen is to befriend people. Now, that isn't always an option, but its easier than one might think. I can also use the common conception of the LPI to my advantage- most criminals aren't scared of us, and might be willing to drop information for what they perceive as a benefit, betting on us not utilizing the information.
Then, there's the shady bit... I've dealt with my fair share of Outcasts, and the nastiest thing they do to people is get them addicted to Cardamine. Awful, vile stuff, but it has never failed them, and if it comes down to it, the security of Liberty is worth a few lines crossed. I hope I never have to cross those lines, but if I have to, I will.
10. If LPI policy hinders an investigation, what will you do?
If its Liberty or LPI policy, Liberty wins. The purpose of the policy is to keep people safe, and I'll do that. Within the policy if at all possible, but if necessary, I'm willing to take the flak.
Almost done. Now, write a short paragraph or two about yourself not your memoirs, but a short outline of your life, and any characteristics you wish to divulge.
When I came to the LPI, I was a nervous wreck- barely able to speak coherently, and constantly needing to reassure myself that I was, in fact, not going to die. This has changed. I've learned a lot from working here, and have harnessed the power of the work ethic that's gotten me this far. I know now that I have little to fear. All I need do is try, and the way will be clear.
I've also become a bit religious; I found a congregation, and have discussed the liberating feeling of confidence with others there. I don't think I'll ever be an evangelist, but I feel its my place to go forth and help people. That's why the LPI exist, right? At least ostensibly, we are supposed to make things better. Faith enhances that imperative, and I am willing to do what it takes.
"I think I have it handled. So, do any of the flatfoots ever come through here?"
"No, we have a sign marked a while back that there are no donuts permitted in this part of the base. Total hogwash, of course, but it keeps them away. Plus, there's a trail of shiny lights that leads back to Sunbucks."
"Clever."
"We got the air circulation to add to the effect just last week. Takes the Sunbucks smell right through the shiny light trail, and keeps the smell of flatfoots out of our office."
"Amen for that."
"I'll second the motion. Drink?"
"Not on the job, normally."
"Guess the orange juice is all for myself, then."
"Orange juice? I thought you were referring to alcohol, my bad..."
"How long did you say you spent among the flatfoots?"
"About a month, then went on leave for awhile. Pulled my life around, and applied for a transfer. Thank God too, I couldn't stand going back in there."
"I'm surprised you bothered to go back for your stuff."
"Really?"
"I know I didn't. I had the misfortune of working there for a decent bit longer, but I set up a perimeter of water bottles and perfume around my desk. I swear, it works like garlic to vampires. Then again, I came back one day and they had muscled past it, apparently looking for twenty thousand credits someone said they had. That was the day I applied for transfer, and never looked back."
"Huh. Say, how did you end up with the nice wooden desk? I don't see anyone else with them..."
"That would be a reward for busting a cardamine dealer. Specifically, one of the Blue Lotus guys that have been taking over the market recently. Those guys are nasty, I tell you. Most of the small scale smugglers and such are scared witless of them."
"So much for all that propaganda about them being fragmented and weak, I guess..."
"Oh yeah, you can use that fear to your advantage. We've had some luck telling people we work for them and threatening them with all that entails, and you know you've run into someone important when they aren't scared. Its gotten me out of a lot of tight situations."
"That's nice to know. Anything else I should know?"
"Well besides the handbook, I would suggest getting a feel for the place before going for the serious cases. Finding pirates isn't too hard, especially in New York, since you can just threaten to call in the cruisers if they don't talk, but if you're up to it you might want to go for some murders or something. Drugs and artifacts are hard to catch red-handed, especially Junkers and Blue Lotus. Damn they're good at what they do, and they're good at giving us hell if we press too hard. Talk to the boss if you want stories about what they can do."
"That would be Frank Quinn, right? Scrawny fellow with dark hair?"
"Yeah, that's him. He may not look the part, but he's easily the most efficient man I've ever met."
"Alrighty then. Thanks, mister..."
"Ross McDuff, at your service."
"Thank you, Ross."
A few silent minutes passed as Ross returned to his work and Larry finished unpacking his belongings.
"So, how long does it take for work to show up around here?"
A piece of paper printed out of one of the nearby machines. Ross grabbed it, skimmed it for a few seconds, then handed it to Larry.
"See you in a week, you're off to the California system. Good luck, don't die, and if you stop on Los Angeles, would you grab me a teddy bear for my collection?"
"Good morning, Detective Morrison. You're here to work on the Brown case, right?"
"That would be correct. Any leads so far?"
"Not much, but the information we do have is contained in this briefcase. You'll be staying in that hotel over there, the one with the eagle on top. If there's anything you need, you know where to find it. Good luck!"
"Thanks."
Larry headed off to his hotel room, and after getting everything arranged opened up the briefcase. There were several reports of a certain Liberty Rogue known only as "James Brown" leading spearheads against Liberty Navy craft, with deadly effect. The man was also guilty of destroying supply shipments to the Yukon, and was often mentioned as being terribly slippery in his actions, always hanging back and going for objectives while the escorts were tied up with his goons. Lately he had been spotted on Planet Los Angeles, and docking officials had been given special clearance to look out for him. Larry's orders were to find and capture the criminal before he could find a way off-planet.
As Larry contemplated his first move, he noticed a piece of paper had been slid under his room door.
Quote:You aren't the only one looking for Mr. Brown.
Turner Square, 21:00, tonight.
Alone. We'll know.
Intrigued, Larry changed into business attire and examined his new firearm. It was a sleek, black pistol, one of the newer Ageira creations. Smiling to himself, he holstered it and set off to find a map.
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