The Privateer's Way

[mtjsmith]

Fergus Campbell was not a happy man at the best of times. Today he was pissed. The self-styled Captain, wearing the rags of an old Bretonian Navy uniform, barged the doors open to the forgotten bar. As he swaggered in, he stared down at the rabble of men and women sitting around the table at the back. With little fear, and quite a lot of Dutch courage, he moved to stand at the corner of the table - Only to be blocked in his path.

"Move it."

He threw the man to one side and as he did so, pistols and assorted arms were directed at him.

"What, ye think ye boys can organise a frecking party wi'out meh? Aye, I should'a known ye would'a been behind this lil' get-tae-gether Nerfolk! Dinnae ken ye' gotta 'way wi' whit ye' put me through Nerfolk! I've nae forgotten. Aye, fiove years o'confinement 'coz of yer stupid muppet police aye?! I've nae forgotten!"

A hush surroundeds the table, as an unnamed privateer whispers something in Fergus's ear. He bursts into laughter.

"Aww ye've got tae.. ahaha! HAHA! Ye've got some balls Nerfolk.. Pity they're never used fer tha' right reasons aye? HAH!"

Daring the men to pull the trigger, he reaches behind him. The pistols point at his head. He looks sarcastically at the rabble and puts on his best mocking tone, only saved for moments of utter victory.

"Naw ye daft buggers, this be a celebration o'tha posh muppets assecendace! This be tha' last bottle o'tha red crap I nicked off a GMS transport. Drink tae tha' last drop 'coz Oi've seen tha' darkness tha' comes tae-wards us. Ye go'n hide on New L'ndon Nerfolk! Us C'ptains'll dae tha' hard work n'actually keep these buggers aff balance."

He drunk straight from the bottle.

"Now, Mistah Moore - I would say tha' yer a pisch C'ptain tae ma-sel, but ye've got more balls n'Nerfolk any day o'tha week. N'these buggers round dis table still ain't lowered their guns at meh. So, I conceed pal. I speak fer tha' crew o'tha Sgean Dubh. Yer tha' man wi' tha' rioght stuff, take us forward n'show tha' posh "nitwit" tha' wat for aye!"

He takes another swig and beams an idiotic grin at the Admiral.

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