To: Miss Olga Drsnova and the generic Xi'an pilot

[arvg]

To: [color=#FFFFFF]The love sick puppy
Comm. ID: Commissar Leon Mendel
Priority: HIGH
Subject: Take a hint, when a woman says no it's usually because your yellow teeth put her off

---Communications Opened---

Hello Honey,

Burnt to ashes, hmm? Seems quite intact to me, a few little score marks, a few dents, but it will take a great deal more than your fervent prayers for the great God almighty to burn up the Havana.

Now as for your lack-lustering, I can recommend you take your pitiful reward money and invest it wisely, perhaps in a retirement home, somewhere in the country, well away from the roasting pits on Crete. A place I am sure you are having nightmares about, after all you keep mentioning ashes. Because the wonderful thing with training, Pumpkin, is that those you beat are hungry now, they are working tirelessly to be ready for you the next time. You, however, are stalled at a rather pathetic antithesis of skill... a virtual paragon of uselessness that they will gladly exploit. No, best you go and tend to your rose garden and leave the fighting to the real men.

Speaking of real men, you seem to be awfully aroused by the thought of being taken roughly by a Commissar. I mean, your heart is all a flutter when you talk to me, at last you have the attention of the object of your obsession. Admit it, you'd rather be spooning with me after a wet, wild and sweaty night of passion, than the selfish and callous love that the Corsairs have on offer. You know full well I'd offer you satisfaction, and just in case you're wondering. I at least buy you dinner first before asking you to sell yourself. Where as a Corsair will have you for dinner after they're satisfied.


With much love,

Leon Mendel
Commissariat of Public Relations

---Communications Terminated--

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