A diplomatic mission

[Evo]

Lancehead moves to sit down, suddenly screwing his facial expression into something rather odd. He grasps at his chest with his mouth open, collapsing shortly thereafter. He'd had a heart attack.


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"What in the hell am I doing all the way out here, again?" Pygmy sighs, shaking his head. Piloting the Retribution, really the only safe vessel to take on such long distances, he briefly looked away from the controls and shouted behind him "SUSAAAAAANNN! BRING ME MY COFFEE, WOMAN!" He shakes his head once more, muttering to himself "I don't even know why I keep that woman around, lousy secretary AND coffee minion."

A few minutes pass of him waiting for his coffee whilst thinking various negative thoughts to himself about the scenery and hatred of lands outside of Liberty and he still does not receive his coffee. He frowns, sighing and grips the wheel hard. Seeing an approaching smaller sized asteroid, he grunts and slams the controls to collide straight into the side of it. The shields deflect it, but a loud audible boom is heard and the ship shakes violently.

A scraggly haired tall woman comes running up the flight deck screaming in a high pitched voice for a dramatically long period of time, until she notices the ship actually isn't going to explode. She glances at Pygmy's empty coffee cup, turning nearly red with fury and stomps up to grab it. She takes it in hand, retreating and later returning with it filled. Pygmy takes it, grinning widely at her and sips rather noisily.

Soon enough, he begins to see Crete in the distance. Evidently, Crete saw him too flying a Liberty gunboat. Erratically, weapons platforms erupt with gunfire and Pygmy swears rather colorfully and puts the ship into evasive maneuvers. Weapons fire flashes by, occasionally hitting the shield with a dull thunk. Soon enough, they actually realized this was not a Liberty Navy warship majorly p'd off due to artifacts flowing into Liberty and coming to smite them. The weapons fire abruptly halted, and Pygmy exhaled for the first time since they opened up.

"And people say WE shoot everything that moves." He sighs loudly in relief, requesting docking permissions. A painfully long near-hour long conversation ensues, but eventually he's allowed to land. Entering the planets atmosphere safely, he follows the instructions Lancehead gave him and lands at the specified coordinates. Stepping out from his ship as the ramp loudly hisses air due to pressure being released, he glances around.

Onlookers would see a short man, standing around 5 foot 2 inches holding a coffee cup. The man appears to be utterly caked in engine oil and various other things you probably don't want to know about. Taking a look around, he sighs and withdraws a metal flask from his back pocket. He pops it open and pours a generous amount of clear liquid into his coffee, swigging it around and spraying liquid droplets on pretty much everything in a four foot radius.

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