1. Martial Law times are over! After short, but warm meeting El Comisario Ladron and Senor Jerard Voncloud, Director of OSI Security made it happen. They will meet again in even more relaxed fashion tomorrow to set all the tiny details.
2. DO NOT BUY WEAPONS, PISTOLS, RIFLES , BOMBS AND OTHER SMALL ARMS. There is nothing to be scared about, except someone is making money on you and your fears. El Comisario Ladron promised sharp investigation and war profiteers will be punished. If you see anybody distributing fire arms in your neighborhood, call closest Carabineros with no delay.
3. If you already have armed your self, Senor Jerard Voncloud will organize collecting all the weapons and will even pay a fair price. This action will take 2 weeks and will be sponsored by Benitez family.
4. Since yesterday all Omicron and Omega liners are flying normally. 57th Carabineros will escort those ships randomly, just for a case. Where are weapons, there are pirates too. Better safe than sorry, as we say on Crete.
5. Our chilly sausage factories are painted in white now. El Comisario will accommodate all graffiti "artists" in his deepest prison cells. Production of sausages will save our nation and must go on.
6. Two more loads of El Mucho Super Conductores are needed for rising production. Stay tuned. Maybe OSI can deliver now. Will see.
El Mucho Super Conductores left to be delivered
Damas y caballeros, gracias for watching our short news. Stay tuned, more news and adventures are to come!