The New Gaian Front Reading Room

[Papa Oomaumau]

So yes.

Well, no.


...well, you'll see.

Here the other night, when all those ion storms rolled through Sirius like Great Gaia's hiccups, I tried to make a bolt from a little hidey I have carved out on a rock in Dublin to the safety of Islay by way of Leeds...
*pauses*
...which BY THE WAY, it pains me to my very core to see what this parasitic mining infestation has done to our own Mother in the Leeds System - Really is it any wonder that all the greed and hate in Sirius is focused there?

*rubs his rubber gloved hands noisily across his bald scalp, a weekr weeeekkkkkrrr kind of sound*

But I digest.
Or rather I...

..well, no...

...either is true.
Anyway!
*smiles quickly, holding up a finger, jauntily*

I flipped on my long ranger's when I came to my senses after that last storm, and something caught my eye.
And, well...

...here's my favorite first minute in a cockpit.
Ever.

*bows and spreads his arms, his vinyl jacket and rubber gloves screeching a cacophony of friction, light dancing off his goggles*
Enjoy!

(P.S.) you have to know this fellow was in California when I first saw him, then Ontario, then finally, this.
Oh, and did you notice his agreement to the contract not to harm Great Mother Gaia by mining ores, or participating in mining ores, or buying anything made from ores, or consuming anything whose production process requires ores, of any kind whatsoever, no matter how slight the relationship?
Next time you see him harming Gaia, remind him of this contract!
*pumps fist madly, producing a sound much like exactly two geese dying of rabies while being trampled by banana slugs*.

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