To: All Mortals wishing to become Moderator From: A.D.M.I.N. HQ

[HuggieSunrise]

Through many an nanosecond ORB reviewed errors in his own cognitive and rational processing. Though many things went outside his perception something did surface on the neural net that got its attention.

Code:

A wonderful privilege is being extended to you on behalf of the Staff. Due to the inadequate supply of kicking targets, otherwise known as Moderators, we are hereby extending an opportunity to apply for this position.

Do you feel you have what it takes to become part of the Staff? We need janitors and maintenance people, not people with god complexes. Those are Admins.

Do you have the time to perform the duties? If so, how much?

Can you install a Sunbucks coffee machine?

Do you have a thick skin in order to withstand the pain when Admins kick you?

Can you put aside favoritism toward your favorite mortals in order to assure justice is done?

Can you put together the parts for a tractor?

You may become knowledgeable of Admin conspir[A]cies. Can you keep confidence?

If you can answer these questions in a satisfactory way, you just might have what it takes to become our next kicking target. This application process is open for two weeks. Afterwards, we will select qualified candidates, put them in a locked room (//Mod chat) and then pepper them with questions until we get tired.

+Interest subroutines have been piqed+

He reviewed the code.. Embedded answers for a return transmission.

1.) Affirmative, job requires great amounts of supervision, catering to questions, formatting best impressions and ensuring guidelines are followed. Admins can do this too but have the added benefit of accepting what this one refers to as "blame".

2.) Freelance nature of work ensures unconventional hours can be devoted.

3.) It is this ones dream to build a sun-bucks across the street from the other sun-bucks. Why? This one theorizes it would result in the division of Zero point.

4.) It hurts less when you don't flinch.

5.) This one would take it a broken trust if its favored mortals acted in a way that would prescribe a deviation of policy. I know they should know better, great wrath should ensue.

6.) This one is regularly asked to assist in farm duties so while I can I may not be available if "pat pat" throws its 5 foot back tire off again.... into the highway.

7.) This one knows some cosmic level BS that is true. Has not leaked any to date and no I wont tell you cause if you really want to know you'll find them yourself.

It was odd, many of these inquiries took longer then .0057 seconds to contemplate.

To a machine that's an eternity.

ORB relayed the answers back in short order and returned to calculating Pi.