For me the relevance of 3d sound depends on the game (standart fps<->arena shooter) and the playstyle I am going for (casual fun<->performance oriented).
I wouldn't be able to properly play Quake Live without 3d sound. Not to speak of being competetive.
When it comes to the average modern shooter I can play just fine with broken headphones and lacking sound on one side. So unless I am playing on an extremely closed map with lots of corridors and edges, relying on reflexes and anticipation does the job.