You got a donut?

[Angelfire]

Edward Pirateson flatulated and belched simultaneously, an art passed down to him by his father, the legendary retired rogue pirate, One.Eyed.Eddie.

'Yew don't becomes a dim poirate loik yer daddy now y' hear me Eddrick? ..hic!' Eddie would say.
'Yew goes ter that thar acadermy and becomes a gewd man! A gewd man oi tells y'! Not a poirate an' not one oh them fool navy SA buffoons ya hears me? A gewd man!'

Edward smiled to himself and sat down to fill in the form he had received from the well rounded officer at the recruitment offices. His time on Sirius servant was coming to an end and it was time to take his place amongst the legends of Sirius...




1. Do you like donuts?

Fudge Donuts with light splashes of chocolate sauce are the objects of my utter adoration. They afflict me with emotions that release an inner light, inspiring me to be more than I am.. at least 5 kilograms more I'd say!

2. Do you like coffee?

Can we sweeten it with Rum? Just a splash maybe? You know.. to take the 'edge' off?

3. Do you like paperwork?

Two ply please.

4. Do you have any flight experience?

erm... does being high on synth as a child count?

5. What is the pay you expect to get from this?

Evidently you get to eat people's livers who pollute the console with strange alien text... I'm in!

6. What hours do you expect/can you work?

well... does work mean..like..WORK? or like... w....o....r.....k?

7. Do you have any objections to strapping yourself to a flimsy, piece o' crap Patriot, with downgraded weaponry and upgraded ejection seats? Furthermore, do you have any objections to taking said crappy Patriot, enforcing the law o' Liberty, God, and Chuck Norris, to a mass of people that don't care one way or the other what you do?

Does it have a cupholder and donut spike onboard? if not, may I customize it accordingly?

8. Are you disgruntled?

erm... I think my father used up that Gene.. does a pleasant lazy do-gooder son of a drunken disgruntled pirate count?

....I think I should add for the record that I have a very short attention spa... hey look, a fudge donut!

---

The Chronicles of Angelfire