Liberty Police Inc. Field Manual (out of date, updating in progress)

[Liberty Police Inc.]

Chapter Eight - Your Taser and You

One device given to all officers is the TT-26A "Long Boy" Hybrid-Conducted Electricity Weapon, known better in LPI service as "The Taser". On it's highest settings, it packs enough of a punch to jumpstart a Liberator, but you should already know that, since all Officers are required to be tased before they are qualified to operate one. That is, if you didn't pay the opt-out fee.

The device is easily operated by a monkey, which means that it shouldn't be hard for most of you to understand how to use. When set to "TASER", as evident by the label next to the fire selector, the weapon will fire two prongs that latch onto the skin or clothing of your target. The intensity of the shock can be changed by a small knob on the left side of the weapon, and the trigger can be held down to prolong the pain.

The device has two main purposes, hence the hybrid designation. The first is to haze new recruits, which usually involves the victim curling up in a little ball for several hours after proper application of the TT-26A H-CEW. The second is for recreational purposes, where officers may sometimes compete with one another to see how many confirmed taser hits they can rack up in a given timeframe. This usually requires use of a standard-issue body camera to capture and confirm the hits, and also usually results in a series of complaints from disgruntled citizens who were affected by the game.

Either way, the taser is a useful tool for shocking your friends or your family. Or even criminals. Yeah, those guys.