Bruddahs, sistahs. Me ku wit' news. Me launched in de Pilgrim earlier, set course ta Gaia, an' put on me best lookin' shoes. Ku ta Gaia, not'in much happenin', me firin' probes ta scan de ice from atmosphere, den tings get real weird, real fast.
Me start hearin' dese voices, from inside me head- Not'in, seem ta me, at first. Me had few drinks, burnt a few fat ones of de Kalisti gold- By de way, de stuff in jars, under de bar in de Depths, 'elp yuhselves. Soon me notice sum'tin' strange, an' me see de Mudda, Gaia, right? Bu' not Gaia like me saw, when me traveled on 'er, but strange- Dere dis girl standin' dere, too. Me still t'ink dat jus' a hallucination, me get 'em a lot. T'ink maybe de biolab scrubbers need ta be replaced. Den, dese squids begin appearin, yah? Big, glowin' purple squids, in space, an' stuff- Wit' some tentacles, wut have yuh. Den, me back at ship, an' me look at scanner, an' me see BIIIIG squid, yah? Like, three-four times de size of de Uxellodunon, mon- It be real big. But den, de squid jus' disappeared!
Fah sum reason, de squid didn' wanna eat me, jus' wanted ta know wut me was doin', yah? So me say, me scannin' de icecaps on Gaia. Normal t'ing ta do, me t'ou't. Den, de squid jus' go silent- De 'Dunon rumbled den, an' she nearly sent me flyin' an' crashlandin' on da Mudda, so den me fired up de engines an' got de hell outta dere. Weird t'ing, weird. Me t'ink dere a squid infestation in Edinbur'. Jonah out, fah now.
