"...Yes..." Therai opened up the journal, apparently a new and blank one, and swiftly scrawled something on the first page with practiced speed, as though she did it all the time. "You have...good taste in wine..."
"Ah, thank you," Lambert said, taking a sip from his own glass to mask his trepidation. "As I may have indicated, I drink fairly often - so I try to ensure I have good stuff on hand."
He cracked a weak smile, belatedly realizing that this made him sound like an alcoholic.
"...Do you feel that is a problem...or do you merely enjoy it...?"
"I enjoy it, but I also feel it is a problem at times," he responded.
"...Tell me about it..." Therai started writing, glancing down at the pages, but occasionally back up at him.
"Well, uh... a lot of the time when things aren't going so well, drinking makes me feel better. I don't always drink to excess, you know - like I can control myself a lot of the time. But sometimes it... gets out of control, y'know?" Lambert took another long drink, lips pursed and body language still a bit uncomfortable.
"...What do you feel...is out of control...?"
"My emotions, I guess. Sometimes I just... like... really hate myself. Or I feel really upset about something. Or both. The alcohol helps with that, usually."
"Would you say that you drink to self-medicate...?"
"That might be a pretty good way to describe it. Not, like... all the time. I can control myself.” He paused, clearly thinking. “But when it gets bad... yeah."
Therai's pen scratched against the paper softly. "How often would you say that this occurs...?"
"Oh, it varies. Couple months ago, it was almost every night for a couple weeks - drinking alone at the Norfolk bar. But it hasn't really happened since."
Lambert frowned slightly in thought before continuing. "Before that... kind of the same thing. Good times punctuated by bad ones. Intermixed. My life's a goddamned roller coaster ride sometimes."
"Did this coincide with anything distressing in your life...or was it merely habit...?"
"Oh no, it tends to coincide with distressing stuff. That Nomad was one such time. There have been... many others."
"...Would you say that your tolerance to it has increased...?"
"To alcohol? Yes, a bit."
Therai nodded, still writing. "Do you go through periods of withdrawal if you try to stop...?"
"A little. I mean, I'll want to drink more if I feel distressed. If I start feeling better, the urge goes away."
"...Do you ever...experience any of the following symptoms...after you have been drinking for an extended period..." Therai paused, took a deep breath, and then closed her eyes. "Hand tremors, insomnia, nausea, vomiting, anxiety, hallucinations, prevalence of nervous tics, or seizures?"
"Yes to everything except the nervous tics and seizures," he responded, frowning slightly in concern.
Therai paused for a moment as she resumed writing. "...Do you...often drink more...or longer than intended...?"
"Yes - when I'm not feeling great. Otherwise, not really."
Therai nodded once again. "Do you...have a persistent desire to cut back on alcohol use...accompanied by unsuccessful efforts to do so...?"
"I mean, I know I shouldn't, but when I feel terrible anyways... I just don't really care, to be honest." Lambert looked down at the floor, averting her eyes.
Therai watched his gaze, then picked up her glass of wine and took another sip before gingerly setting it back down. She adjusted her positioning on the couch before she started writing again.
"How much time...would you say...that you spend attempting to gain alcohol...or recover from its use...?"
"When I feel bad, and I’m drinking a lot... probably a few hours a day. That's all recovering, mind you. I can always get my hands on a drink if I need it."
Therai nodded. "Does your drinking interfere...with your work...hobbies...or social life...?"
"I try not to let it, but I'd be lying if I said it didn't interfere from time to time. Sometimes more so than others..."
"Have you ever given up a job...hobby...or friend...because of your drinking...?"
Lambert thought for a long moment. "Sort of... I left the Navy once, but drinking was more the result of that than the cause... if that makes sense."
"...Yes...that makes sense..." Therai wrote a bit more.
"Do you believe that it has caused you harm thus far...whether physiological or psychological...?"
"Yes," he said, without any hesitation.
"And you continue to drink...even knowing this...?"
"Yes," he repeated. "It makes me feel better in the short term, so that's why I continue."
Therai wrote another sentence, then took a small breath. "...There are seven criteria for alcohol dependence...as detailed by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders..."
"You have met all seven...of three necessary to qualify for it..."
He looked down, shaking his head. "Well, that's not good..."
