Commissar's Feedback

[Rodent]

The lack of feedback in this thread over the years is a damn travesty.

What can I say? I am a big fan, of course. I wish I could take out your writing brain and use it for my own purposes, but I'm pretty sure that'd be illegal. Your approach is clearly quality over quantity, with a very low amount of primary characters but the details, mannerisms and motivations attributed to each are sketched in painstaking detail. I enjoy the detail, I enjoy seeing where they will end up. That attention to detail probably ranks you as the best technical writer that disco's ever had, so that's a positive.

About the only gripe I have from you as a writer is your tendency to get lost in your own prose, to the detriment of plot movement and dialogue. That might just be my personal preference, but after a certain level of detail I just want characters to get on with it, and things to happen. Although you've been working past that certainly in recent posts (with some outside assistance) so if you tackle that barrier down, you'll be ready to write an original novel and I'll read the hell out of it.

Lewis x Hartman is also the cutest.