Remember Me?

[Kauket]

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ENTRY: Intruded mind – Return of the Anxiety attacks

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DATE: 24|05|822 A.S

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God... today was just... no...
This is impossible. Irregardless of some creature's beyond superiority complex of mind manipulation, how is this possible?!

One of my darker secrets, one of my... shrouded memories that were locked in an eternal state of void, a complete deniability, has arisen from said state back into a plaguing existence upon my soul. Should anyone know of the secret, I will just have to... end myself. It is a massive incursion upon my honorary codes, and damn... damn those things, those... creatures. Damn it all. I can't help but feel anxious of it's recovery, of course, now, those damn shivery-bivery sessions of anxiety is back to plague me. This is beyond bad, I cannot even fathom how terrible I would be to even mention it in this log.





I feel as if my mind is going to collapse around me, it's going to take some time to heal...

Urgh... Relevant-but-irrelevant blackbox logs attached. I don't know what to hell Nodtviet was talking to, probably that creature making images in his mind

LOGS

[24.05.2015 21:12:17] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: Uh oh.
[24.05.2015 21:12:23] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: Get out of my head


[24.05.2015 21:12:25] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Ssshh...


[24.05.2015 21:12:25] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: Freak
[24.05.2015 21:12:49] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: NO
[24.05.2015 21:15:07] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: don't you dare
[24.05.2015 21:15:15] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: I will end you


[24.05.2015 21:15:30] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Snap out of it, Raven

[24.05.2015 21:16:25] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: OH GOD IT TOUCHED ME

[24.05.2015 21:17:48] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: If you don't snap out of it Raven, I will open fire on your vessel and force you to snap out of it
[24.05.2015 21:17:58] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: (Shouting) Am I clear!?



[24.05.2015 21:18:03] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: It was right there - ... yes sir.

[24.05.2015 21:18:19] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Good, you've come to your senses.

[24.05.2015 21:18:27] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: OH GOD ITS BACK


[24.05.2015 21:18:43] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Record guncams, immediately.


[24.05.2015 21:19:12] K'Hara|Nergal: **..'Yours' has ventured ~into~ 'ours' ~void~ often ./. "yours' deemed "unfit"..**


[24.05.2015 21:19:21] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: That damn thing is always after me
[24.05.2015 21:19:36] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: It makes me feels things that I don't want to feel


[24.05.2015 21:19:50] K'Hara|Nergal: **..{Metal Husks} of 'yours' belong "nowhere" in 'ours' ~void~ [Anger]..**



[24.05.2015 21:20:02] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: We'll see this time.


[24.05.2015 21:20:33] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: It's trying to imply it owns this system... our system.


[24.05.2015 21:20:40] K'Hara|Nergal: **..~spitfire~ shall "rain" upon those {metal husks} 'yours' shall "swim" on..**


[24.05.2015 21:20:46] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: Gross.


[24.05.2015 21:20:59] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Nomad I do not fear you, you are merely a resource.
[24.05.2015 21:21:20] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: We are here to exploit you, harvest you and harness you.


[24.05.2015 21:21:32] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ The Captain of the Ark Hammers eyes flicker as he tries to view upon the nomad }*
[24.05.2015 21:21:49] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ You blink and see a flash of light }*
[24.05.2015 21:22:23] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ Your head becomes sore, you whipe your eyes and look left. There is a ghostly figure standing next to you }*
[24.05.2015 21:22:40] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ It takes the form of someone close to you }*


[24.05.2015 21:22:55] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: *Nodtviet shakes his head then slams his fist on the console*
[24.05.2015 21:23:04] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Insolent creature, your mind games will not work with me.


[24.05.2015 21:23:10] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ "I say" it speaks quietly "Is this... a better form to talk to you in? }*


[24.05.2015 21:23:35] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: *Turns towards the figure*


[24.05.2015 21:24:21] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: (wondering)
[24.05.2015 21:24:28] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: Is everything... fine over there?


[24.05.2015 21:24:31] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Bah, taking the form of my subordinate. A pathetic tactic.


[24.05.2015 21:25:17] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ "Is it. Look at yourself, you're in disbelief. You're in... a state of chaos" THe figure wonders over to Nodtciet }*


[24.05.2015 21:25:40] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: ... Sir?



[24.05.2015 21:26:06] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: The thing has taken on your form, Raven.


[24.05.2015 21:26:15] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: What?


[24.05.2015 21:26:24] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Odd, but the creature must have some implication behind doing it.



[24.05.2015 21:26:31] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ "You're.. as mess. Cleanse your mind, young one" She looks towards Nodtciet. A purple haze appears around her eyes }*


[24.05.2015 21:27:44] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: My mind is already pure, your influence has no effect on me.


[24.05.2015 21:27:45] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ "Look deep into your heart. The others... they've just bretrayed you" Her body flickers slightly as she extends her arms -
[24.05.2015 21:27:53] K'Hara|Nergal: taking a good look at them }*



[24.05.2015 21:28:29] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Mhm, I recall those people well, creature.
[24.05.2015 21:28:37] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Most of them are dead. I've made sure of that.


[24.05.2015 21:28:50] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: (confused)



[24.05.2015 21:29:20] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ The figures takes another form, a form of a recently murdered victim of Nodtviet's }*



[24.05.2015 21:29:58] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ "Do you see what you have done to your... fellow "human-kin"? }*


[24.05.2015 21:30:29] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: As soon as you betray me, get in my way, or stray from my cause, you are no longer 'my kin'.



[24.05.2015 21:31:47] K'Hara|Nergal: *{" An adamant one. " The figure looks into space from the bridge and points into the direction of the "Eidolon.Wraith"}*


[24.05.2015 21:32:13] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: What about her?


[24.05.2015 21:32:21] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: What is going on over there?


[24.05.2015 21:32:43] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ "Trust. Trust is a rather large part of the "human-kin"" The figure pauses for the moment "What makes you think -
[24.05.2015 21:32:52] K'Hara|Nergal: you can trust her and her vessel?" }*


[24.05.2015 21:33:04] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: ... sir?
[24.05.2015 21:33:09] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: (Starts to worry a little bit)



[24.05.2015 21:34:02] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Nothing.


[24.05.2015 21:34:15] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: Nothing? You're talking to... yourself, or it...


[24.05.2015 21:34:16] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: I have no reason to believe she won't simply gun me down right here right now.


[24.05.2015 21:34:26] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: Me?



[24.05.2015 21:34:44] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: The leader of The Core could be destroyed right here, right now, and no one may know it ever happened.
[24.05.2015 21:34:59] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: That happens often here, in the Omicrons.
[24.05.2015 21:35:06] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: I loved someone once who did that to a friend.
[24.05.2015 21:35:24] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: However.


[24.05.2015 21:35:32] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ "Do..." *The figures turns back around and faces Nodtviet* "Your trust in her is... strong. So to say. However -
[24.05.2015 21:35:55] K'Hara|Nergal: trust can easily be broken. People can use your trust agaisnt you. They can use you to gain what they want }*



[24.05.2015 21:36:03] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: What stops her from shooting me is the respect she holds for her superior.



[24.05.2015 21:36:18] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: (she sighs and takes a step back from the console and folds her arms)


[24.05.2015 21:36:58] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: And she knows I'm the only person in the Omicrons who can truly bring our goals to fruititon.


[24.05.2015 21:37:02] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ "The emotion... trust.. is a complicated feeling" The figure pulls a chair and sits down on it, crossing one leg over the -
[24.05.2015 21:37:06] Death: FreeFighter was put out of action by a hostile vessel.
[24.05.2015 21:37:06] K'Hara|Nergal: other }*



[24.05.2015 21:37:09] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: I do not care if I am used.
[24.05.2015 21:37:20] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Ultimately, we are all a means to an end.


[24.05.2015 21:37:42] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: Does it really think I am trying to abuse you?



[24.05.2015 21:38:11] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ "And, we are back where we started. Two entities fighting over the void. During war, trust can easily be betrayed -


[24.05.2015 21:38:19] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: If you are, of course, implying about me...


[24.05.2015 21:38:25] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: However creature, we are powerful tools.
[24.05.2015 21:38:32] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: And some tools are more powerful than others.



[24.05.2015 21:38:45] K'Hara|Nergal: so take a look at her over there" The figure points to the Eidolon Wraith once more "And think twice. She could turn }*


[24.05.2015 21:39:28] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ Purple hazes flicker around the figures eyes }*


[24.05.2015 21:40:10] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: The trust I have for her relies in the trust she has in me.
[24.05.2015 21:40:23] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: I have a purpose, and that purpose is to eradicate your kind from the Edge Worlds.
[24.05.2015 21:40:37] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: People rely on me to finish that purpose.



[24.05.2015 21:40:41] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ "Trust no one, and you'll do better. Look over those who you think you 'trust' and think again" }*


[24.05.2015 21:40:53] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: (Knowing action is soon to be upcoming, she goes back on to her control console)


[24.05.2015 21:41:36] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Out here I trust myself, and the trust people have in me.
[24.05.2015 21:41:57] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: That is what makes me strong. That is what makes all of us strong.



[24.05.2015 21:42:07] K'Hara|Nergal: *{ The pain in your head slowly dies away. You look at the figure and see that it is slowly vanishing}*

[24.05.2015 21:43:09] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Good, begone with you.
[24.05.2015 21:43:21] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: I'd prefer shooting at something that doesn't look like my subordinate *Grins*.


[24.05.2015 21:43:33] K'Hara|Nergal: **..Those you "trust" are those that "betray" 'yours' ~human kin~ ./. "kingdoms" shall fall, the "void" will rise..**


[24.05.2015 21:43:56] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: The Core are unstoppable.


[24.05.2015 21:44:11] K'Hara|Nergal: **..'yours' {metal husks} are "supplements" for ~spitfire~..**
[24.05.2015 21:44:30] K'Hara|Nergal: **..{metal husks} "protect 'yours' from ~spitfire~ for so long..**

[24.05.2015 21:44:54] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Good thing you will all be dead before then.

Whatever. We returned to the Freeport, as the creature vanished into the depths of the void again. I gave Guildmaster Nodtviet a little notice of my mind's incursion, but oh no, he 'just wishes the utmost best of his subordinates' – Right?! Right. Because that's absolutely hilarious, he never cares about anyone. Ever. I feel like a fluffin' tool…

LOGS

[24.05.2015 21:45:18] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: I-I'm sorry sir.

[24.05.2015 21:45:25] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: It's fine.
[24.05.2015 21:45:29] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Lets return home.


[24.05.2015 21:46:34] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: I-It... knew my trigger.. Impossible, no one knows my trigger


[24.05.2015 21:47:28] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: You lack an iron will.
[24.05.2015 21:47:50] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Strenuous training in the MND prepared me for moments like this.


[24.05.2015 21:48:05] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: This is something I've kept hidden from -everyone- and even myself.


[24.05.2015 21:48:06] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: ...I wouldn't recommend the same training to you, however.


[24.05.2015 21:48:28] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: and how it is rediscovered, annoys me yet, resets my anxiety.

[24.05.2015 21:50:10] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: For now, you need to relax.


[24.05.2015 21:50:35] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: If you need me, I'll be in my dorm. I just wish to be alone for now, so I can overcome this.

[24.05.2015 21:51:53] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: I suggest against being alone.


[24.05.2015 21:53:28] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: Why?


[24.05.2015 21:54:10] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Sanity is at it's weakest when you don't have other people to support you.


[24.05.2015 21:54:39] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: And who do you think I should be around?
[24.05.2015 21:55:20] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: My "friends?" Blergh - they're all probably boozing off like tarts. I feel more clear when alone, I find it easier t
[24.05.2015 21:55:27] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: to relax, sit back, and analyse the situation.


[24.05.2015 21:55:41] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Well, I'm here.



[24.05.2015 21:56:01] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: I'd imagine you'd have more important things to do, no?


[24.05.2015 21:56:21] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: The safety of my subordinates, both mental and physical, is important to me.


[24.05.2015 21:56:38] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: (sighs)
[24.05.2015 21:56:46] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: Then what, what is it that I should do?
[24.05.2015 21:57:19] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: This is always what I've done. I've meditated on the issue, I relax, I analyse, and sometimes take a warm bath.



[24.05.2015 21:58:34] Core|WV-Ark.Hammer: Nodtviet: Take a warm bath, I'll be ready to talk to you once you're done.


[24.05.2015 21:59:08] Core|WV-Eidolon.Wraith: Raven: Very well…

Urgh.

He had better things to do, seriously, now he's going to come barge on the Eidolon to spout his little crappy speeches. I guess. I'll just take a quick shower then head off to the training room, I suppose a little violence will clear my mind and help me focus. Fluffing anxiety though. I- I … I can't focus. It's too noisy like a noise of screetching metal, the room like if it's impacting on me, crushing me like a grape. A-ahh, training room it is then...