Peg Leg Johnny and Crew..

[timmychen]

The six pirates were sat down in chairs in front of Johnny, who hobbled in front of them. He had put his peg leg back on, and had taken something out - an object that resembled a plastic, blunt dagger.

"Alright, ye pigs! Listen up! I won' be takin' much o'yer time, so ye list'n up and list'n good! ...Oi!"

Numbnut, who was the most immense of them all, was fast asleep. Johnny hobbled over to him and jabbed him in the thigh with the dagger. Not only did it do nothing, but the fat around Numbnut's waist began to pull the dagger inwards, swallowing it inside all that fat. Johnny then grabbed Numbnut's hair and slapped him 'round the face a couple times. It worked.

"Ye awake now? Ye gonna stay awake now?! Don' make me jettison yer arse out in space an' see how ye like that!

Now then! Back t'where I was...

Ye, I stole yer money and yer ships. Actually, I no longer be havin' yer ships anymore.. they be scrapped fer more money. But stay cal--OI! I said, stay calm! Stay in yer seat, now! Or I be usin' me leg to beat ye over th'head with! An'ways, with all yer goods and mine combined, we be havin' a little o'er 12 million credits! This ain' half o'what we be needin! The boat an' her gear be costin' near 25 million credits! Men! We be needin' credits! An' I need ye to think o' HOW!"

Blanco raised his hand.

"Aye, Blanky?"

"When do we get our rum?," he asked.

"If ye don' shut up, ye be drinkin' the vacuum o'space! Next! Aye, BlueBeard?"

"What 'bout yer ship? Will we be scrappin' that too?"

"OI! ARE YE NUTS?! SCRAP ME BHARGEST? THAT BE.. THAT BE.. that be not a bad idea, actually. IIf I be gettin' rid o'the ship and me guns, the amount'll come out to.. 'bout four million! 'Celent thinkin, boy!"

Johnny began hobbling back and forth again. "Hmm.. that make the total come out to.. sixteen million! Arr! Nine more t'go! But that still be a good 'mount o'money... where t'get it?

We be tryin' the sympathy game. All o'ye, get in yer worst clothin' and.. actually, nah, what ye be wearin' now will do fine. Go to th'streets of Manhattan and bum yerselves out. Get ev'ry corner, get ev'ry credit ye can. Report back t'me here on Buffalo in two days!"

And with that, Johnny arranged a escort for the six poor pirates.