So you're not exactly at your best right now? Everything you're saying screams to me "I am stressed out and the community I shouldn't even care about anymore has one person who was filming who I shjote and is blowing this whole thing out of proportion."
Why should a sanction concern you unless you had plans to come back to the server at a later date, which you indicated wouldn't happen?
(I'll bump your chars for you every few months, PM me a list; may as well do something nice for you at least.)