A discreet beacon, on the outskirts of Omicron Gamma...

[Lanakov]

You selected response A... After a slight moment, punctuated by electronic beeps and bops from the beacon, you are greeted with the following audio recording, from a deep, honeyed voice :

"Har har har har har ! You have fallen into my trap, Bretonian ! For it is known to us that, when presented with such a choice, only the poor, culinarily-disadvantaged Bretonian mind would go for "Boil". Nice try, Breton ! Enjoy this meal of boiled shame with mint sauce, you were not the target of this transmission. Har !"

The recording continues like this for some time, with other voices joining in a very nasal laughter and mockery. Then you can make out a distinct "Merde ! Ca enregistre toujours !" before the recording abruptly ends.

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You selected response B... After a slight moment, punctuated by electronic beeps and bops from the beacon, you are greeted with the following audio recording, from a deep, honeyed voice :

"Well well... It is unexpected to find a Libertonian this far from home ! Yes, do not deny it : only your kind seemingly enjoys putting everything you can find in a vat of frying oil. We do not deny that good things came out of it, but you went too far with the fried synth paste. So long, Libertonian : it is not you we have business with today.

The recording continues for a few seconds with a background voice making a rather distressingly accurate parody of the Libertonian accent... As perceived by someone who hasn't talked with Libertonians much.

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You selected response C... Immediately, the beacon bursts to life and broadcasts the following video transmission, loudly, on all frequencies. A strikingly handsome face appears on the screen, with an amused smile.

Honoured Corsairs,

I see you have managed to defeat my most clever enigma ! I had tailored it specifically so that only our latin brothers and sisters from the Hispania, bound by the same love for fermented delicacies, would manage to unlock it. If my friend Sauveur here did his job properly, this message should only appear to you, as befits our purpose.

And here is said purpose. Let me introduce myself : I am José Nivalgo, member and tribun of the Unione Corse, looking for his next big score. And that big score is you, my friends. You see, the Unione is a quiet organisation, but not a passive one. Anyone needs anything special in Gallia, they come to us, and we provide. There is nothing that we consider out of our reach, and no limit to our... or perhaps I should say, my ambitions. Ever since Gallia and the rest of Sirius were... Reunited, so to speak, we've been observing, listening, and making small steps to gain an ever greater foothold in Sirian markets, be they white, gray, or black.

Recently, we've noticed a surge in interest in your group from our Royal friends. We had heard from you before, from a mortal enemy that we seem to share : the Outcasts, and a mutual friend, the Hogosha. So I thought the Unione should not pass this opportunity to make contact with its long lost brothers and sisters. You see, Gallia may be one thing, but the Corsicans have not forgotten their roots : there was much we shared once, and more still to be shared.

So, on the meat of the matter : we want to exchange goods. There are all kinds of goods the Unione has easy access to, that could benefit your industry : samarium, nanotubes, energy field equipment, even those blue diamonds that seem to be all the rage over yonders. With our expertise at moving anywhere discreetly, as demonstrated by the insertion of this elaborate beacon, our partnership needn't even be apparent. In return... Well. It's hard to visit Liberty as often as I do and not hear of those famed Artifacts of yours. The Unione would love to get into that trade and support your... export ventures in that field.

But I may get ahead of myself. For now, let us start with a formal shaking of the hands. The Unione doesn't have the firmest grip on whom it is that runs Corsair affairs and I wasn't sure whom to contact. Hence this clever beacon plan. I... huh... Hope that this message reached a relevant receiver. So let's start with introducing yourselves in return, and we'll see where we go from there. In the end, my objective is that all profit from this new adventure, so let us lay the first brick on our common road to great fortunes together. You may reply to this beacon, and it will... should... take care of bringing your message back to me.



A prestu, then, honoured friends. The Unione will be waiting eagerly for your reply.

End of transmission.

Oh, merde. I hope I don't get too much Zoner spam from this beacon... Should have thought of a more clever filter, perhaps...