Nesrin Khan Character feedback.

[Ash]

This isn't feedback on your character but more feedback on your writing. I've read some of your material and i'll say this much, you're certainly a gifted writer. It's rare to find a story that will capture my attention long enough to read past the introduction. You're not being predictable with your themes which is good. Though i've noticed for a few of your stories there's alot of digression: a lot of routine chatter for character building and context, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. But the plot doesn't really go anywhere during this time which left me wondering what's the point to it all. This may have been the effect you were after, but if after 500 words i haven't got a feeling of momentum in the storyline then i lose interest. Mystery is good, but keep it to about one or two of things if you're introducing it it early on, You can develop more later. I'm looking forward to what you'll write next, so don't be disheartened by anything anyone may say. People can be harsh, cruel and spiteful to make themselves feel better. After all, this is the internet.

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