Liberty's finest

[Elvin]

James Gray entered the LPI office. He was a strange person indeed, slim tall body, long brown hair and never disappearing wide-smile on his face. Today he was wearing his favorite T-shirt. Very shine orange color with a big title "My other car is fully functional battlestation". When se saw the recruitment officer his smile was getting even wider. He was looking on the snoring man for a while, then he took his wallet from his pocket, took out all the money and returned it. Then he sticked a paper on his back. There was a text on the paper : To get a donut, touch my butt. Now, James was satisfied. "Time to wake up grandpa!" Man slowly wake and after short talk gave the paper for new recruits to James. " Time to start then... "

1. Do you like donuts?
Yes. *scratches on head* I think so.

2. Do you like coffee?
Yes, coffein is very important fr my existence... Its the essence of my life.

3. Do you like paperwork?
I dont know that food. Is it from Kusari?

4. Do you have any flight experience?
<strike>Hell yeah after the marijuana combined with alcohol we are "flying highhhhhttt" with my fellows</strike> I mean yes, I fly a starflier since early childhood.

5. What is the pay you expect to get from this?
Nothing specially really, I just expect to get a mansion, car collection and a few ships.

6. What hours do you expect/can you work?
Wait, I will have to work? Try to say it again and Ill sue ya.

7. Do you have any objections to strapping yourself to a flimsy, piece o' crap Patriot, with downgraded weaponry and upgraded ejection seats? Furthermore, do you have any objections to taking said crappy Liberator, enforcing the law o' Liberty, God, and Chuck Norris, to a mass of people that don't care one way or the other what you do?
Yea, I want Liberator, its pretty... I have just forget what I wanted to say... Yes. ... What is that God? Brother of Chuck?

8. Are you disgruntled?
When i was small Ive had a cat. I dont have it anymore.


"Goddamn, grandpa you are sleeping again." Firstly he wanted to woke him up ... But then he smiled, gave the paper next to him and searched the office for valuables. There was only rotten donut and milk which was turned into stone. "Do I really wnat to end like that?" he said silently, watching the old sleeping man, who had just scratched his butt. "Oh man."... "I have better go..."... and so he left the office....

After a min he jumped back in, took mans wallet again, took out LPI ID card and replaed it with Car rental club card "Need a car? Call 1-800-CRAP". Satisfiend once more, he left...

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I buy things I don't want to make an impression on people I don't like.