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Nyctophilia · (This post was last modified: 09-17-2018, 11:01 AM by Nyctophilia.)

Date - 16.09.825 A.S.
Location - Freeport 11
Log Author - "Nyctophilia"

I-eh... I think I'll write down what happened in the last two days in this one log.

So... Yesterday I've met with Kimiko and the rest, but... She was completely different. She lost her left eye, but it wasn't any simple injury... The place where her eye was completely clear, except... There was no eye at all. A complete void.

Code:
[15.09.2018 20:45:46] Nyctophilia: Every time I go there, I feel like I am unwelcomed.

[15.09.2018 20:45:51] Gossamer: *She takes a deep breath*

[15.09.2018 20:46:19] Volcarona: Katherine: You're certainly welcomed. I just- I can't believe how wrong things went last time.

[15.09.2018 20:46:35] Volcarona: Katherine: I feel awful about that. Have either of you heard from the poor boy?

[15.09.2018 20:46:40] Nyctophilia: Nope.

[15.09.2018 20:46:42] Gossamer: What happened?

[15.09.2018 20:47:07] Nyctophilia: I will let Kath tell all the story.

[15.09.2018 20:47:13] Nyctophilia: Since she's here now.

[15.09.2018 20:47:15] Volcarona: Katherine: *sighs heavily* I brought a young man here, Unioner. He was very....interested in the Light.

[15.09.2018 20:47:38] Volcarona: Katherine: I know it was risky, but he had an open heart and I thought it would work out.

[15.09.2018 20:48:07] Volcarona: Katherine: Unfortunately, John freaking Silverstone followed and refused to leave when we asked for privacy.

[15.09.2018 20:48:32] Volcarona: Katherine: The Lights showed up, but they were wary and confusion reigned.

[15.09.2018 20:48:55] Volcarona: Katherine: Then, the Unioner's damn wingmate decided to follow as well, and it was too much.

[15.09.2018 20:49:13] Volcarona: Katherine: The Unioner ships were destroyed, I don't know if they made it out.

[15.09.2018 20:49:32] Gossamer: I see...

[15.09.2018 20:50:14] Gossamer: I want to believe they lived.

[15.09.2018 20:50:15] Volcarona: Katherine: It's all very frustrating, because I really believed in the boy. If he did make it out, I doubt he'll want anything-

[15.09.2018 20:50:21] Volcarona: to do with us after that.

[15.09.2018 20:50:50] Nyctophilia: And... That was the first time I ever saw you getting so angry at anyone in person.

[15.09.2018 20:51:21] Volcarona: Katherine: It felt awful, it's not like me and I don't want to feel that way. I just couldn't believe somebody I wanted to work

[15.09.2018 20:51:35] Volcarona: with would disrespect my wishes in that way.

[15.09.2018 20:51:58] Gossamer: I can help bring him to the Light.

[15.09.2018 20:52:10] Nyctophilia: Not John, no.

[15.09.2018 20:52:21] Nyctophilia: But if the boy survived - we all look for this.

[15.09.2018 20:53:08] Nyctophilia: John is... Hopeless at this stage.

[15.09.2018 20:53:17] Gossamer: *She looks at something in her hand, then closes it shut*

[15.09.2018 20:53:22] Volcarona: Katherine: I met him in Rheinland and had a nice chat at Kreuzberg's bar. He's a kind, genuine individual.

[15.09.2018 20:53:47] Volcarona: Not John, obviously. I thought John would be useful, but clearly that was a lapse of judgement on my part.

[15.09.2018 20:55:38] Nyctophilia: Still, I hope we will get to see him one day. And know him in person more.

[15.09.2018 20:55:41] Volcarona: *sighs* Anyway, enough of that. What's your story, Kimi? I really need some reassurances here.

[15.09.2018 20:55:56] Nyctophilia: Uhm...

[15.09.2018 20:55:59] Gossamer: I... Maybe she can explain. *She points to Melia*

[15.09.2018 20:56:04] Volcarona: Katherine: Oh, Melia's here too! Wonderful.

[15.09.2018 20:56:23] Nyctophilia: Hi.

[15.09.2018 20:56:30] Volcarona: Katherine: It's me, I'm just on my other ship. Well, obviously you can tell that.

[15.09.2018 20:57:14] Vagrant.Melia: "Yours used such a shell before. It is known."

[15.09.2018 20:57:41] Volcarona: Katherine: Yes, I mostly use it when I need more cargo space, but today, it's just for leisure.

[15.09.2018 20:58:29] Nyctophilia:  ...What kind of connection Melia has to your lost eye?

[15.09.2018 20:59:18] Gossamer: *She removes her helmet, letting her hair fall over her suit* It's not Melia, but...

[15.09.2018 21:00:31] Nyctophilia: Come on, no need to be so shy.

[15.09.2018 21:01:21] Gossamer: *She removes her eyepatch. There is no evidence of an injury. Merely a bottomless void where the eye was.*

[15.09.2018 21:02:07] Volcarona: *Katherine let's out a silent gasp*

[15.09.2018 21:02:24] Volcarona: What- what is that...?

[15.09.2018 21:02:29] Nyctophilia: *as Nycto sees the video transmission, she covers her mouth with her right wrist*

[15.09.2018 21:02:49] Nyctophilia: That's... That's no injury. What happened to you, Kimi?

[15.09.2018 21:03:02] Vagrant.Melia: *It repositions itself near the ferry.*

[15.09.2018 21:03:41] Vagrant.Melia: "It has happened."

[15.09.2018 21:04:31] Volcarona: Katherine: *gleefully* You're touched by them. But how? I've never seen anything like it before.

[15.09.2018 21:05:06] Nyctophilia: But... *she touches her own eyes* I've been through it too. And yet nothing happened to me.

[15.09.2018 21:05:10] Gossamer: *Kimiko removes her right glove and takes out a small purple, crystal ring. The moment she puts it on, her left eye begins to emit a massive spectra of color*

[15.09.2018 21:06:17] Volcarona: *Katherine's eyes and mouth widen* There's so much more that I haven't seen...I never imagined...

[15.09.2018 21:07:19] Nyctophilia: *she still watches her in awe* N... No...

[15.09.2018 21:08:29] Gossamer: *Kimi appears completely consumed in whatever is causing this phenomenon. Her right eye begins to glow purple, and her mouth is agape.*

[15.09.2018 21:08:41] Nyctophilia: N-now I know why the clinic can't help you...

[15.09.2018 21:09:57] Volcarona: Katherine: To....to think you had a bad run in with a heckler at the Freeport...

[15.09.2018 21:10:57] Gossamer: *Kimi remains completely absorbed, most likely operating in some other capacity right now.*

[15.09.2018 21:12:21] Nyctophilia: I can not even imagine of what she is thinking right now...

[15.09.2018 21:12:23] Volcarona: Katherine: You're already feeling like they are, in some way, aren't you. I wonder what you're feeling now.

[15.09.2018 21:14:33] Vagrant.Melia: *Melia remains close to the ferry.*

[15.09.2018 21:16:42] Vagrant.Melia: *Its presence seems to be just as oblivious as Kimiko is to its surroundings, only a passive glance seems to be present.*

[15.09.2018 21:18:57] Gossamer: *Kimiko's nose begins to bleed.*

[15.09.2018 21:19:13] Volcarona: Katherine: I, uhm. I wonder if I should- oh my goodness!

[15.09.2018 21:19:24] Nyctophilia: Oh no-o-o, that's no good.

[15.09.2018 21:20:01] Vagrant.Melia: *Melia started to gain distance from the ferry.*

[15.09.2018 21:20:06] Gossamer: *Slowly and shaking, she removed the ring from her finger. The glowing ceased and Kimi collapsed.*

[15.09.2018 21:20:16] Nyctophilia: And no, I am not leaving her here, if that's what you are thinking.

[15.09.2018 21:20:33] Vagrant.Melia: *Its focus returned to the others.*

[15.09.2018 21:21:39] Nyctophilia: No... no-no-no-no-no!

[15.09.2018 21:21:59] Nyctophilia: Grrh... If only...

[15.09.2018 21:22:03] Gossamer: *She seemed to be resting contentedly*

[15.09.2018 21:22:06] Volcarona: Katherine: Kimi?! Are you okay? Can you hear us?

[15.09.2018 21:22:23] Vagrant.Melia: "Patience. Theirs requires time."

[15.09.2018 21:22:49] Volcarona: Katherine: I- I know. I'm just concerned for a friend.

[15.09.2018 21:23:26] Vagrant.Melia: "Distance yourselves from their shell."

[15.09.2018 21:25:15] Volcarona: Katherine: Intruder.

[15.09.2018 21:25:47] Volcarona: Katherine: Oh, a machine. Of course.

[15.09.2018 21:25:56] tC-Progenitor: "Affirmative"

[15.09.2018 21:26:14] Gossamer: *The ferry remains immobile*

[15.09.2018 21:26:46] Volcarona: Katherine: What's happening with her, Melia? It's...difficult for me not to worry.

[15.09.2018 21:27:03] Vagrant.Melia: "Theirs must rejuvenate. Patience."

[15.09.2018 21:27:22] Nyctophilia: Difficult not to worry? That's an understatement.

[15.09.2018 21:29:00] Volcarona: Katherine: Well, she's undergoing a development that she desires...but one which I can't pretend to understand.

[15.09.2018 21:29:58] Nyctophilia: I mean... Even I didn't had such kind of radical changes ever since the last time. Well... Maybe visually.

[15.09.2018 21:30:32] Nyctophilia: But... her eye, my goodness...

[15.09.2018 21:30:41] Gossamer: *After a bit of time, she woke up, murmuring.*

[15.09.2018 21:31:51] Nyctophilia:  ...Kimi? Are you alri- oh...

[15.09.2018 21:32:23] Gossamer: I... I don't know... Last time it happened, on Moros...

[15.09.2018 21:32:25] Death: Lu'vaha was put out of action by a hostile vessel.

[15.09.2018 21:32:34] Gossamer: *She slowly got up*

[15.09.2018 21:32:38] Nyctophilia:  ...-On Moros?-

[15.09.2018 21:33:17] Volcarona: Katherine: What did you- hm. More visitors.

[15.09.2018 21:33:28] Fabre|Aoi: ***...'flesh'...***

[15.09.2018 21:33:37] IRG|Itherael: V: Something could say 'new.' I suppose.

[15.09.2018 21:34:19] Gossamer: *She tries to get back up to the controls, but stumbles and falls again*

[15.09.2018 21:34:47] Volcarona: Katherine: It's okay Kimi, move slowly.

[15.09.2018 21:35:06] Nyctophilia: Just enter the formation. It will be alright.

[15.09.2018 21:35:29] Gossamer: *She slaps a button on the dashboard from the floor and the ship forms up*

[15.09.2018 21:35:30] Fabre|Aoi: ***'ours' permit 'darklings' in the 'void' (?) - (confusion)...***

[15.09.2018 21:36:00] Volcarona: Katherine: There's been a whole lot of confusion here lately, you aren't the only one to feel it.

[15.09.2018 21:38:08] Fabre|Aoi: Bonjour Nyct.

[15.09.2018 21:38:16] Nyctophilia: Hi!

[15.09.2018 21:38:39] Fabre|Aoi: Did you bring these... visitors here?

[15.09.2018 21:38:58] Nyctophilia: Nope, it was actually Kath.

[15.09.2018 21:38:58] Volcarona: Katherine: I brought them here. We had to discuss things in private.

[15.09.2018 21:39:18] Fabre|Aoi: Private like?

[15.09.2018 21:39:31] Volcarona: Katherine: As in, away from the Freeport and the eyes nearby.

[15.09.2018 21:39:49] Fabre|Aoi: Katherine.. names familiar.

[15.09.2018 21:40:06] Fabre|Aoi: But your husk is not.

[15.09.2018 21:40:22] Volcarona: Katherine: I would hope so. I know I'm not in the RV, but this is the ship I used to supply the Arch of Light.

[15.09.2018 21:40:29] Volcarona: For a certain recent project.

[15.09.2018 21:41:18] Fabre|Aoi: Well..

[15.09.2018 21:41:46] Volcarona: Katherine: What of the IRG? Are they invited here?

[15.09.2018 21:41:58] IRG|Itherael: V: I personally didn't receive an invitation.

[15.09.2018 21:42:12] Volcarona: Katherine: Why are you here?

[15.09.2018 21:42:27] IRG|Itherael: V: Surveying. Waiting for additional parties.

[15.09.2018 21:42:37] Nyctophilia: As in... Auxesia?

[15.09.2018 21:42:38] Fabre|Aoi: ***...'ours' -light- named 'melia' - 'theirs' shall -remain- (confused) (?)...***

[15.09.2018 21:42:45] IRG|Itherael: V: Why would we wait for Auxesians?

[15.09.2018 21:42:54] Nyctophilia: Wild guess.

[15.09.2018 21:43:05] IRG|Itherael: V: Wildly incorrect.

[15.09.2018 21:43:53] Volcarona: Katherine: Is this to be....tolerated? It's a massive warship. Last time I saw it, it destroyed one of our.

[15.09.2018 21:44:01] Volcarona: Due to an alleged misunderstanding, but still.

[15.09.2018 21:44:18] Nyctophilia: [REDACTED]: I still do not trust them.

[15.09.2018 21:44:33] Nyctophilia: [REDACTED]: The last time I saw it, it was hanging around an Auxesian Battlecruiser.

[15.09.2018 21:44:56] Preparing to cloak...

[15.09.2018 21:45:05] Nyctophilia: Wild guess.

[15.09.2018 21:45:06] Cloaking device on

[15.09.2018 21:45:09] Volcarona: Katherine: Melia, what is your feeling towards them? Oh, and speak of the devil.

[15.09.2018 21:45:16] IRG|Itherael: V: They have no business with us here.

[15.09.2018 21:45:30] IRG|Itherael: V: Well, at least on our front.

[15.09.2018 21:45:39] /time

[15.09.2018 21:45:39] 2018-09-15 21:45:44 SMT 

[15.09.2018 21:45:39] Gossamer: *She retches onto the floor, her ship still following*

[15.09.2018 21:45:50] Volcarona: Katherine: Stay close to us, Kimi.

A freaking auxesian and an IRG showed up. I never thought that I'd have negative feelings towards zoner researchers, but something was telling me that they're all in the same bed. But... Yesterday felt like I shouldn't have been there, so I decided to leave as soon as possible.

I had to take a ship that nobody was aware of, except the ones who did. And fly under my name. Guess what - same thing happened again. I was looking around the Edge and Border worlds, until I eventually runned into Melia... And Kimiko. We had an... interesting chat about how things go around, or rather how I perceive them, until she eventually invited me to board her Ferry.

Code:
[16.09.2018 16:04:37] [REDACTED]: Hi-oh.

[16.09.2018 16:04:48] Gossamer: I see... Well, I recognize that voice.

[16.09.2018 16:05:22] [REDACTED]: I have reasons to hide.

[16.09.2018 16:05:53] Gossamer: *She smiles, nodding*

[16.09.2018 16:05:56] Vagrant.Melia: "Curiosity."

[16.09.2018 16:06:01] [REDACTED]: And I'm sure you saw them yesterday.

[16.09.2018 16:06:34] Gossamer: "Understanding. This darkling inhabits another husk. Nyctophilia."

[16.09.2018 16:07:06] Vagrant.Melia: "A familiar one."

[16.09.2018 16:07:33] [REDACTED]: I am Nyctophilia. And I am [REDACTED].

[16.09.2018 16:07:47] [REDACTED]: Although, these names are almost irrelevant for Melia.

[16.09.2018 16:07:53] [REDACTED]: However, they are for my kind.

[16.09.2018 16:08:01] Gossamer: We both know your soul. *She nods*

[16.09.2018 16:09:10] [REDACTED]: As I said... None will ever know my real name. I've burned my ID long ago, as soon as I've discovered it myself.

[16.09.2018 16:10:01] Gossamer: You're understanding more, little by little.

[16.09.2018 16:10:28] [REDACTED]: Although... I must appologise for running away yesterday, but I can't afford auxesians getting on my track every now and then.

[16.09.2018 16:10:52] [REDACTED]: A wild guess was a truth, after all.

[16.09.2018 16:11:09] Vagrant.Melia: "Curiosity. The bird's followers seek you?"

[16.09.2018 16:11:13] [REDACTED]: Yeah...

[16.09.2018 16:11:58] Gossamer: Huh. Go figure. I'm guessing they lumped me in with you guys.

[16.09.2018 16:12:39] [REDACTED]: If they will turn into the same pro-humanist group as the Order, I will not tolerate their existance.

[16.09.2018 16:12:52] Gossamer: I don't think they're the same. At all.

[16.09.2018 16:14:06] [REDACTED]: Who knows.

[16.09.2018 16:14:18] [REDACTED]: By the way... How come do you know of them, Melia?

[16.09.2018 16:14:44] Vagrant.Melia: "The Light knows well of them."

[16.09.2018 16:15:10] Vagrant.Melia: "The Greater Lights have demanded their toleration. Our paths have crossed multiple times."

[16.09.2018 16:15:23] Gossamer: They're nothing like the Order or Core.

[16.09.2018 16:15:30] [REDACTED]: That's... Interesting.

[16.09.2018 16:16:37] Gossamer: Perhaps we should move away from the jump hole, just in case.

[16.09.2018 16:16:41] Vagrant.Melia: "Another."

[16.09.2018 16:17:15] [REDACTED]: Hello.

[16.09.2018 16:17:26] Gossamer: It's okay. You're safe.

[16.09.2018 16:17:46] R.Barbero: R: Greetings

[16.09.2018 16:18:00] Gossamer: You can come back if you wish.

[16.09.2018 16:18:36] [REDACTED]:  ...Yes. Moving further from the traffic would be wise.

[16.09.2018 16:20:16] Gossamer: What do you know about Auxesia, anywho?

[16.09.2018 16:20:31] [REDACTED]: All I know that their leader is unreasonable.

[16.09.2018 16:21:05] Gossamer: Anything else?

[16.09.2018 16:21:06] [REDACTED]: She tried to kill me with an antimatter weaponry, while commanding a battlecruiser, and endangering a Freeport.

[16.09.2018 16:21:15] Vagrant.Melia: "They follow a path contrary to the darklings of hatred."

[16.09.2018 16:21:47] Vagrant.Melia: "They seek understanding, yet they do still show hostility to the Bretheren."

[16.09.2018 16:22:16] Gossamer: It's... complicated.

[16.09.2018 16:22:20] [REDACTED]: Quite.

[16.09.2018 16:22:54] Gossamer: The K'Hara are... more suited to war. Extinguishing and purging the darkness with violence.

[16.09.2018 16:23:05] Gossamer: They've had to adapt, Kat's told you.

[16.09.2018 16:23:13] [REDACTED]: I know, I know...

[16.09.2018 16:23:43] [REDACTED]: I even had a conversation with Melia about them and... All that the impossibility of reunion seemed irrelevant for me.

[16.09.2018 16:23:55] [REDACTED]: Like... How in the world their kind cannot reunite?

[16.09.2018 16:24:00] Vagrant.Melia: "Different paths. Different minds."

[16.09.2018 16:24:07] Gossamer: *Kimi takes off her helmet and places it on the seat besides her. She appears to be in the process of decorating her eyepatch.* I'm starving, y'know?

[16.09.2018 16:24:44] [REDACTED]: I... Have some spare food here, if you want some.

[16.09.2018 16:25:08] Gossamer: Nah, it's alright. I'm just gonna go fetch something from the galley.

[16.09.2018 16:25:17] [REDACTED]:  ...Well then.

[16.09.2018 16:25:27] Vagrant.Melia: *Melia begins to softly glow.*

[16.09.2018 16:25:34] Gossamer: *She gets up, and the sound of rustling through a kitchen can be heard in the background*

[16.09.2018 16:27:10] Gossamer: *Eventually she returns with a huge bowl of ramen, far larger than anything a girl her size should consume.*

[16.09.2018 16:27:28] [REDACTED]: Have a good one.

[16.09.2018 16:27:59] Gossamer: *She begins to utterly devour the meal as if she had been starving for days.*

[16.09.2018 16:28:56] [REDACTED]: * [REDACTED] rests in her pilot chair, staring at the sun through her sun glasses. She slowly exhales* Yeah...

[16.09.2018 16:29:05] [REDACTED]: Yesterday wasn't the most pleasing day...

[16.09.2018 16:29:47] Vagrant.Melia: "Amusement. The Forgotten Void was filled with darklings. It was not."

[16.09.2018 16:30:15] Gossamer: *She speaks with her mouth full* Yeah, 'at 'eally 'ucked.

[16.09.2018 16:31:25] Vagrant.Melia: *The glow continues to rhythmically shine through Melia's form.*

[16.09.2018 16:32:26] Gossamer: *Eventually, she finishes rather quickly, placing down the bowl.* I don't know why, but ever since my change, I've been really hungry.

[16.09.2018 16:32:47] [REDACTED]: You mean... The eye?

[16.09.2018 16:33:35] Gossamer: Well, that, and the other one.

[16.09.2018 16:33:41] [REDACTED]: Hmm...

[16.09.2018 16:34:33] [REDACTED]: Don't really know... After my first interface with Melia, I had a really strong headache.

[16.09.2018 16:34:47] [REDACTED]: It lasted for... Maybe twelve hours at least.

[16.09.2018 16:35:06] Vagrant.Melia: "The dark form is not well suited to receiving the song."

[16.09.2018 16:35:17] Gossamer: Yeah. Our nervous systems weren't designed for this kind of thing.

[16.09.2018 16:35:41] Vagrant.Melia: "The blessed one must grow. It will adapt to listen without impediment."

[16.09.2018 16:36:16] Gossamer: *She smiles warmly* It's new ground for us.

[16.09.2018 16:36:20] [REDACTED]: It was just after the first time... The second time it wasn't hurting as much. Maybe because I was distracted by

[16.09.2018 16:36:23] [REDACTED]: the other thing...

[16.09.2018 16:37:15] Gossamer: You're acclimating to it.

[16.09.2018 16:37:27] Gossamer: The more you're exposed, the more your body will accept it.

[16.09.2018 16:37:34] [REDACTED]: Slowly, but steady - yeah.

[16.09.2018 16:39:45] [REDACTED]: Still, I anticipate the moment when I get to experience it again.

[16.09.2018 16:40:05] [REDACTED]: Or... Maybe something new.

[16.09.2018 16:40:11] Gossamer: Heh, you never know. Depends on your path.

[16.09.2018 16:41:27] [REDACTED]: I just know that the only thing is happening around is you. Everything is... Not as actual as it was.

[16.09.2018 16:41:46] [REDACTED]: War in Sigmas, in Liberty, mercs hunting someone.

[16.09.2018 16:41:55] Vagrant.Melia: "It is unusual for moments to carry a single meaning."

[16.09.2018 16:42:17] Vagrant.Melia: "The voids are always changing."

[16.09.2018 16:42:36] Gossamer: We must learn to adapt if we are to grow.

[16.09.2018 16:43:06] [REDACTED]: But all I see is a perpetual repeat of everything that was before. A cycle.

[16.09.2018 16:43:45] Gossamer: Perhaps that is because it is only human to perceive patterns.

[16.09.2018 16:44:12] [REDACTED]: And just somewhere inbetween the cycles there is a pattern of change.

[16.09.2018 16:45:11] Gossamer: You must learn to overcome the mind's conventions. And embrace solely what you can perceive.

[16.09.2018 16:45:24] Gossamer: And from there, you can expand.

[16.09.2018 16:47:28] [REDACTED]: Believe me, I know my own limits.

[16.09.2018 16:47:51] Gossamer: *She smiles* I thought I knew mine.

[16.09.2018 16:48:57] [REDACTED]: You just... Won't understand if you won't live my own life.

[16.09.2018 16:49:19] Gossamer: Ah, these words are so clunky...

[16.09.2018 16:49:25] [REDACTED]: I am talking about the perpetual cycle that always repeats. 

[16.09.2018 16:49:53] [REDACTED]: As in. We were having the best time I could ever imagine, but then everything started to go downwards.

[16.09.2018 16:50:02] [REDACTED]: And now we're here again.

[16.09.2018 16:50:39] Gossamer: Well, that's because of how you perceive time.

[16.09.2018 16:51:28] [REDACTED]: It's rather not how I perceive it, it's how I anticipate things to happen based on my own experience

[16.09.2018 16:51:38] [REDACTED]: Which... Wasn't the best one.

[16.09.2018 16:52:01] Gossamer: But still. You see past in memories. Present in your vision. And future in your ideas. And that is all.

[16.09.2018 16:52:51] Gossamer: So of course suffering seems a cycle, with good and bad dueling in a wheel as one flows into the other.

[16.09.2018 16:53:11] [REDACTED]: I have no ideas about the future, I can only assume what will happen.

[16.09.2018 16:53:24] [REDACTED]: That's why I don't plan anything. That's why I don't have any ambitions.

[16.09.2018 16:54:05] Gossamer: *She seems to be struggling with the words, not quite able to phrase her meaning*

[16.09.2018 16:55:59] [REDACTED]: I simply can't afford.

[16.09.2018 16:56:03] Gossamer: I... Well, let me approach this differently.

[16.09.2018 16:56:30] Gossamer: Is it fear of losing what you have? The happiness?

[16.09.2018 16:57:00] [REDACTED]: I said, I have nothing to lose. I am always ready to accept anything.

[16.09.2018 16:57:08] [REDACTED]: To even lose happiness.

[16.09.2018 16:57:32] Gossamer: I wanted to accept sadness as inevitable because I was afraid of being hurt more when I lost happiness.

[16.09.2018 16:58:52] Gossamer: But... I learned that you never really have to lose happiness.

[16.09.2018 16:59:29] Vagrant.Melia: "It is what becomes that will be."

[16.09.2018 17:00:04] Gossamer: Maybe once this form of mine is more adapted, I can show you.

[16.09.2018 17:01:21] Gossamer: It's hard to use solely words to show.

[16.09.2018 17:01:25] [REDACTED]: I know.

[16.09.2018 17:02:25] [REDACTED]: But even if I can wait forever, I'm not an "iron lady".

[16.09.2018 17:02:39] [REDACTED]: If auxesians will keep getting on my nerves, I will lose it.

[16.09.2018 17:03:03] Gossamer: Calm and patience. If you wish to learn, you need this.

[16.09.2018 17:03:14] [REDACTED]: I know, I know.

[16.09.2018 17:03:19] Vagrant.Melia: "Patience."

[16.09.2018 17:03:33] [REDACTED]: But I can't hide forever either, nor I can risk my own reputation or neural stability.

[16.09.2018 17:03:52] Gossamer: *Feebly, the light within Kimiko reaches out to [REDACTED], trying to give her some measure of serenity. It is very weak.*

[16.09.2018 17:04:16] [REDACTED]: If they won't reason with me - people will suffer. Because of them.

[16.09.2018 17:04:42] [REDACTED]: *For some reason, [REDACTED] seems to be quite serious about Auxesians being hurt. Kimiko's attempt doesn't seems to be quite effective.*

[16.09.2018 17:05:24] Gossamer: If we are to grow, we need to let go of aspects that hold us back. Hatred is one.

[16.09.2018 17:05:47] Gossamer: We must transcend base concepts like revenge and our primitive 'justice'.

[16.09.2018 17:05:53] Vagrant.Melia: "Perhaps we may be able to shift the bird's followers."

[16.09.2018 17:06:28] [REDACTED]: That's not the case.

[16.09.2018 17:06:41] Gossamer: We may be able to change things.

[16.09.2018 17:07:06] [REDACTED]: Seeing every single bounty hunter and a merc following you just for a pure sake of claming your bounty is discusting.

[16.09.2018 17:07:29] [REDACTED]: If you'd be in my place, I think you would understand.

[16.09.2018 17:07:53] [REDACTED]: I tolerate it as of now, and because they don't know my name, I can hide. But if they find out somehow, I won't.

[16.09.2018 17:10:03] Gossamer: Listen. Can you dock with my ferry?

[16.09.2018 17:10:26] [REDACTED]: I actually tried the last time. When you... Lost consciousness or something.

[16.09.2018 17:10:51] [REDACTED]: If your Ferry has an extended bridge - sure.

[16.09.2018 17:11:56] Gossamer: Yeah. The airlock in the back should be able to facilitate a simple connection.

The ship's interior was... Nothing I could ever imagine to be a ship's interior. It looked like an actual house. No wonder she feels that comfy in this ship...

Code:
[16.09.2018 17:12:30] Gossamer: *The outer doors of the airlock open up, and small clamps extend to stabilize and attach the Eagle to the ship.*

[16.09.2018 17:13:49] [REDACTED]: *Nycto downs on the EVA-suit and opens her cabin. She proceeds through the extended bridge to into the Ferry's Airlock*

[16.09.2018 17:14:55] Gossamer: *The airlock door closed and repressurized, the room decontaminating and returning to a normal atmosphere.*

[16.09.2018 17:15:54] [REDACTED]: *As she enters the airlock, she removes the helmet and looks around.*

[16.09.2018 17:16:32] [REDACTED]: *She knocks on the internal door of the airlock twice* Hello? Anybody home?

[16.09.2018 17:16:41] Gossamer: *The interior is typical of OS&C design. Sleek, art deco lines and abstract shapes decorate the walls. The door slides open and reveals the opposite: Kimiko has renovated this place to appear like a mixture of a wooden cabin and a college dorm.*

[16.09.2018 17:17:47] Gossamer: One second! *Kimiko can be heard in the small bathroom near the cockpit.*

[16.09.2018 17:17:52] [REDACTED]: Wow...

[16.09.2018 17:18:27] [REDACTED]: *She walks in slowly, carefuly observing the interior decorations.*

[16.09.2018 17:18:36] Gossamer: *There were fairy lights strung across the ceiling, tapestries and various band posters on the walls, and rustic wooden furniture mixed with repurposed, prefab appliances. Instruments and music bookss lay strewn across the floor.*

[16.09.2018 17:20:51] Gossamer: *Kimiko emerges from the bathroom, wearing a light white sundress, her patchy jean jacket and hiking boots. She smiles.*

[16.09.2018 17:20:56] Gossamer: Welcome to my little home.

[16.09.2018 17:21:54] [REDACTED]: *After a small observation, [REDACTED] takes a brief look at Kimi* Yeah... That's... Not any home I saw. *She keeps looking around, 

[16.09.2018 17:22:02] [REDACTED]: fascinated by the interior design.*

[16.09.2018 17:23:04] Gossamer: *The girl takes a seat on one of two futons facing each other, basking in the warm, colorful lights hanging from the ceiling*

[16.09.2018 17:23:18] Gossamer: Come on and take a seat! *She motions to the futon opposite her's*

[16.09.2018 17:24:04] [REDACTED]: *[REDACTED] takes a careful walk around, still observing the decorations, before taking a seat near Kimi*

[16.09.2018 17:24:42] [REDACTED]: Where did you get these?

[16.09.2018 17:24:44] Vagrant.Melia: *Melia seems to have positioned itself in a location relatively favorable to the ferry's observation lounge.*

[16.09.2018 17:24:48] Gossamer: Take a moment to just relax. Feel every part of your body from your feet to the top of your head uncoil, one by one...

[16.09.2018 17:25:00] Gossamer: I got all this from my old home on Curacao.

[16.09.2018 17:25:29] [REDACTED]: Huh... Wow... 

[16.09.2018 17:26:30] [REDACTED]: *Not minding the EVA-suit, she somehow relaxes in the futon.*

[16.09.2018 17:27:22] Gossamer: *Kimi takes deep breaths, enjoying the serenity of the hum of the engines, the warmth of the sun's rays above*

[16.09.2018 17:27:34] Gossamer: Just... feel everything  around you.

[16.09.2018 17:28:59] [REDACTED]: *some kind of thoughts keep wrapping around her head. Still, Melia's presense and the sun rays keep her in peace.*

[16.09.2018 17:29:37] Gossamer: It feels nice, doesn't it?

[16.09.2018 17:30:11] [REDACTED]: From one side... Yeah...

[16.09.2018 17:30:54] Gossamer: Ponder it. The feeling of nothingness. Peace.

[16.09.2018 17:31:14] Gossamer: How still the pool of the mind can be when no ripples disturb it.

[16.09.2018 17:31:43] Gossamer: *A pleasant aroma of incense floats in the air*

[16.09.2018 17:33:15] [REDACTED]: *Not matter how she tries to relax, something keeps her concerned.*

[16.09.2018 17:34:11] Gossamer: You are safe here. Nothing shall harm you. The Light protects. *A soft purple glow hums in her right pupil*

[16.09.2018 17:34:52] Vagrant.Melia: "The Light shall provide the calm."

[16.09.2018 17:35:07] [REDACTED]: *Being totally oblivious of everything and with her eyes closed, Jane is still concentrated on her thoughts and whatever is

[16.09.2018 17:35:12] [REDACTED]: distracting her calm.*

[16.09.2018 17:36:35] Gossamer: *Kimiko takes out her small purple ring, placing it on her right hand and removing her eyepatch. Her left eye casts out a glowing rainbow of color.* Let me in. Open yourself up.

[16.09.2018 17:37:59] [REDACTED]: *[REDACTED] is still trying to figure out what is this feeling that doesn't lets her to be in peace. However, she appears to be aware of it.*

[16.09.2018 17:38:24] [REDACTED]: *The fear of the ones who are close to her to be hurt.*

[16.09.2018 17:39:29] Gossamer: *Two presences orbiting each other can be felt on the periphery of Jane's awareness.*

[16.09.2018 17:40:04] Gossamer: "Serenity. No harm shall come."

[16.09.2018 17:41:14] [REDACTED]:  ...What is this... No. I know it.

[16.09.2018 17:41:51] Gossamer: "Let it happen." *The words came from two voices at once. Each of the Twin Lights.*

[16.09.2018 17:42:12] [REDACTED]: *she grumbles* I always told myself to not get too close with anyone... Or I will start caring...

[16.09.2018 17:43:15] [REDACTED]: No... I don't want them to be hurt.

[16.09.2018 17:44:00] Gossamer: "Open your heart to us." *The Lights continue beckoning her*

[16.09.2018 17:45:13] Gossamer: *For a brief moment, the feeling of Kimiko pleading innocently flashes in this connection*

[16.09.2018 17:46:00] [REDACTED]: *[REDACTED] feels something reminiscent yet again. But from something or someone else.*

[16.09.2018 17:47:33] [REDACTED]: I... Don't want... them... to be... hurt... *she remembers the void where Kimiko's eye used to be, the she swiftly remembers the "dark side" of Katherine that was triggered by Silverstone.*

[16.09.2018 17:48:30] Gossamer: *At the moment the memories surfaced, the Twin Lights gave the elation of Kimi's gift and vision, and Kat's love of the Light.*

[16.09.2018 17:48:41] [REDACTED]: *Afterwards, she remembers how Melia obliviously chased an Order agent.*

[16.09.2018 17:50:18] Gossamer: "The past exists. As does the present. And so does the future. They are all one. And all joy and warmth with it."

[16.09.2018 17:51:08] Gossamer: *The sensation of warmth entered into [REDACTED]'s awareness, and a sense of timelessness came with it*

[16.09.2018 17:52:18] [REDACTED]: The... Warmth... *[REDACTED] feels the same warmth as she felt before. Not too hot, not too cold. Even in her EVA-suit.*

[16.09.2018 17:53:16] Gossamer: *The warmth moves inside her, deep in her chest* "Let go of fear. An illusion. Serenity."

[16.09.2018 17:54:40] [REDACTED]: I just... don't want them... to be... hurt... *Struggling to letting go a thought that her friends might be hurt, she somehow accepts the warmth.*

[16.09.2018 17:54:56] Gossamer: *A vision of a small, frightened child appears. Her fear echoes in the mind of Jane. But slowly, she overcomes the fear in little lumps, moving her body from the corner she is hidden in ever so slightly, before eventually standing and walking.*

[16.09.2018 17:55:35] Gossamer: "Yours does not inflict pain."

[16.09.2018 17:56:00] Gossamer: "Embrace the love and joy of the whole. Of the 'friends'."

[16.09.2018 17:56:56] [REDACTED]: They do... That is why I am worried...

[16.09.2018 17:57:38] [REDACTED]: The events I am unable to influence. They happen.

[16.09.2018 17:57:58] [REDACTED]: And they hurt the ones I care about.

[16.09.2018 17:58:25] Vagrant.Melia: *Something... distant, yet familiar, seemed to be watching.*

[16.09.2018 17:58:30] Gossamer: *The thought of the worry hurting her friends enters [REDACTED]'s mind. A sense of complacency and acceptance of life's injuries.*

[16.09.2018 17:58:50] Gossamer: "Pain is inevitable. For all."

[16.09.2018 17:58:51] [REDACTED]: I don't care if they hurt me... But I care if they hurt them. I cared before... And when I stopped, it all became alot easier.

[16.09.2018 17:59:16] [REDACTED]: If they hurt themselves or if anyone hurts them... That is the worst outcome.

[16.09.2018 17:59:38] Gossamer: *A pang of heartbreak reverberates through Jane, but is soon quickly overwhelmed by a sensation of happiness and love.*

[16.09.2018 17:59:54] Gossamer: "The Light purifies the Darkness."

[16.09.2018 18:00:33] [REDACTED]:  ..My heart was broken many, many times... I've suffered a lot of pain and I know how to adapt to it.

[16.09.2018 18:01:26] [REDACTED]: But... I've never, never in my life had this kind of friends. And this is yet again the first time I fear them to be hurt. 

[16.09.2018 18:01:31] Gossamer: *The emotional turmoil repeats over and over again until the presence of other lights joins alongside [REDACTED]. Slowly, the heartbreak fades as each light carries the burden. And the feeling of elation grows.*-

[16.09.2018 18:01:33] [REDACTED]: Not by anyone, but by themselves.

[16.09.2018 18:02:08] Gossamer: "To embrace others is to lessen their pain. And yours."

[16.09.2018 18:04:25] [REDACTED]: It's just... I don't know... I had to let it out. I've been keeping it within me for quite a while...

[16.09.2018 18:04:48] Vagrant.Melia: *Melia's form manifests in the mindscape.*

[16.09.2018 18:05:16] [REDACTED]: But if it won't hurt them... I'm not afraid to accept the Light.

[16.09.2018 18:05:37] Vagrant.Melia: "Your pain would be ours, and that of the whole. Shared, it would be overcome."

[16.09.2018 18:06:22] Gossamer: "Unity. We are whole."

[16.09.2018 18:06:30] [REDACTED]: I... I know...

[16.09.2018 18:07:12] Gossamer: "No harm shall come from compassion."

[16.09.2018 18:08:12] [REDACTED]: Just... There are a few who understand how I feel. The fear of losing them is what holds me back...

[16.09.2018 18:08:17] Vagrant.Melia: "Shed the emotions of harm. Replace them with the emotions of peace."

[16.09.2018 18:09:09] Gossamer: "Yours are but a miniscule part of the whole of the universe. Nothing is ever lost. Embrace this eternity."

[16.09.2018 18:10:02] [REDACTED]: I know... 

[16.09.2018 18:10:37] Gossamer: *The encouragement to not merely know, but let herself *feel* the letting go of self, prodded at [REDACTED] warmly.*

[16.09.2018 18:11:21] Vagrant.Melia: "Serenity."

[16.09.2018 18:12:05] [REDACTED]: *[REDACTED] still fights with her fears, but seems to be overcoming them.*

[16.09.2018 18:12:24] Gossamer: *The temptation to melt and give in to the universe, letting everything loose, grew slowly. The Twin Lights of Kimiko and her light within, which seemed to have the name Amphitrite, slowly orbited closer and closer, almost merging.*

[16.09.2018 18:13:56] Vagrant.Melia: *Melia's manifest form was near, observing and comforting.*

[16.09.2018 18:14:29] [REDACTED]: I... Don't have to worry about them... They will be alright... I am certain... *[REDACTED] finally overcomes her fear, as she feels

[16.09.2018 18:14:37] [REDACTED]: the scale of the Universe.*

[16.09.2018 18:15:17] Gossamer: *The sense of peace, the insignificance of all worries... it all seems to overpower her with the gentle strength of the cosmos.*

[16.09.2018 18:15:43] Vagrant.Melia: "Accept the nature. Do not contest it."

[16.09.2018 18:16:08] [REDACTED]: I am... Always ready... To accept... Everything...

[16.09.2018 18:17:26] [REDACTED]: *She was imagining the twists withing the galactic cores, any possible races all across the Universe. But at the same time, she was completely calm.*

[16.09.2018 18:17:40] Gossamer: "Yours are ours. Theirs are ours. Ours are all of one universe. One existence."

[16.09.2018 18:18:13] Vagrant.Melia: "Light. Darkness. The voids. They are all of matter."

[16.09.2018 18:21:11] [REDACTED]: *And in a moment, her attention focused on Sirius. The confronation of Light and the Dark.*

[16.09.2018 18:23:56] [REDACTED]: *She let go all the thoughts about conflicts, and remained serene in the warmth.*

[16.09.2018 18:24:31] Vagrant.Melia: "Joy."

[16.09.2018 18:24:43] Gossamer: "Harmony."

[16.09.2018 18:25:39] Gossamer: *In time, the presence of the Twin Lights would fade, and Kimiko would return to the material world once more.*

[16.09.2018 18:25:48] [REDACTED]: *She was thinking about the peace, as the feelings of joy and harmony reached out to her.*

[16.09.2018 18:27:03] Gossamer: *Her body could only remain so long before it suffered, and she was fast asleep on the futon, with the ring resting on her abdomen*

[16.09.2018 18:27:23] Vagrant.Melia: *Melia's presence would cease to maintain a manifest form. The mindscape would begin to retract into nothingness.*

[16.09.2018 18:27:32] Vagrant.Melia: *All would be back as they were.*

[16.09.2018 18:27:53] [REDACTED]: *[REDACTED] appears to be slowly awakening. Not shedding any tears this time.*

[16.09.2018 18:28:40] [REDACTED]: *She slowly opens her eyes and looks around, with a weird expression on her face.*

[16.09.2018 18:30:07] Gossamer: *She looked incredibly peaceful*

[16.09.2018 18:31:07] [REDACTED]: *She takes a look at Kimi* Uhm... Kimi? Are you fine?

[16.09.2018 18:31:41] Gossamer: *She was fast asleep, looking exhausted from the experience.*

[16.09.2018 18:32:30] [REDACTED]: Hmm... *she takes a look around*

[16.09.2018 18:33:00] Gossamer: *Were [REDACTED] to leave, the controls for such were fairly intuitive and accessed via a panel in the back*

[16.09.2018 18:33:47] [REDACTED]: Right... I think I'll leave her alone... *She stands up, downing her helmet and heading to the airlock.*

[16.09.2018 18:34:13] [REDACTED]: *As she reaches the airlock, she closes the internal door, giving Kimi a last gaze.*

[16.09.2018 18:35:20] [REDACTED]: *The airlock depressurises, and Jane presses the button on her right, which immediately opens the bay door.*

[16.09.2018 18:36:24] [REDACTED]: *As she exits the bay door, she heads off through the extended bridge to her Eagle, closing the door by pressing a button on the Ferry's hull.*

[16.09.2018 18:37:21] [REDACTED]: *She slowly proceeds to her cabin and as she reaches it, she enters it, closing it and cutting off the extended bridge on her end.*

[16.09.2018 18:37:53] Gossamer: *The ferry's autopilot would ensure Kimi did not fall behind*

[16.09.2018 18:38:09] [REDACTED]: *She wears off the EVA-suit* Okay... Eh... The extended bridge...

[16.09.2018 18:39:06] Gossamer: *The ferry prepared for flight and retracted all docking clamps, ready for transit.*

[16.09.2018 18:40:49] [REDACTED]: *She straightens her hair and takes a look at Melia.* What?

[16.09.2018 18:41:26] Vagrant.Melia: "We shall swim through the voids."

[16.09.2018 18:41:50] [REDACTED]: Why not...

Yeah... It wasn't just Melia. It was her. Which means she is with them. I can't say that I'm frightened, because... That's all she ever wanted. More like... I'm actually happy for her. She was there way after Kath... And me... And they've accepted her that fast. And I know me, and if I was me, I'd feel jealous about it, but I don't... Huh. There are changes after all. Still, I am anticipating the moment to become one with them... But there is more to be done.

N.

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