LPI Leavenworth

[Zapp]

Sir, were coming up on an uncharted planet!

All was quiet on the bridge as the officers assiduously played Pac-Man and Pong; however someone must have been watching the scanners. How odd. Clements was a bit confused, and angry.

WHADDYA MEAN UNCHARTED PLANET?! Were in New York! We cannau jump! Da entire system is charted, cept fer dat blind spot that is huge and near Norfolk. What be da planets name?

Scanners are showing it as Maine, sir.

Then how it be uncharted?

I dont know sir, it just is!

As the idiocy of the conversation hit home, Clements did the classic facepalm.

Yer fired. Bring in da back-up Red Shirt 1564! Two LPI flatfoots came onto the bridge and grabbed the old guy by both arms, forcing him off the bridge. Some other random guy came in and took his place.

Well? What ya got ta say? Clements asked in a threatening tone.

Theres an uncharted planet on sensors, sir!

Gritting his teeth, he said slowly: Well then send down a search party. The barely controlled anger obvious.

Right away, sir. A couple of Patriots took off and landed. Soon after, a voice crackled over the comms.

Sir, weve found an alien spaceship thats crash landed!

WHAT?!

Our thoughts exactly sir. Were bringing it back up.

At the launch deck

The two Patriots flew in, towing in what appears to be a crashed Patriot. Clements was beside himself. What ya mean alien spaceship? Dat be a Patriot foo!

Thats what we thought, sir, said the first guy out of the first Patriot, But we found alien life.

And you brought it here?!

You told us to.

I did nau! Get eet off ma ship!

Right away, sir

Before he could move, the ships canopy opened and starved ferrets were everywhere, gnawing and biting and scratching everything.

AHH! MY LEG! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! screamed some random person, and complete pandemonium ensued. Clements pushed his way to the front of the screaming and milling mass of people, yelling Im more important than all you, outta ma way!

The lights dimmed and ominous music started playing. Clements was running, but had to stop to catch his breath. This random LPI officer ran up, yelling. Hey man, we gotta move! Theyre everywhere! They catch us, its GAME OVER man, GAME OVER!

Clements slapped him, saying Get a hold of yourself, man! Just then, the ferrets came. Wave on wave, they blanketed the floor decks in a furry, writhing carpet of ravenous hunger.

We gotta MOVE, man! the guy yelled, grabbing Clements and running in the other direction. Clements, making a decision, pulled out his cell phone and called for help.