Bowex InfoNet (inRP)

[jammi]

Incoming Transmission from Planet Cambridge
Cambridge, Kingdom of Bretonia
23rd March 827 A.S.

To: Bowex InfoNet
Priority: Normal
Topic: Avant-courier services and improper theology

Message Contents:

It must be said, today has been in equal parts tedious and invigorating. You number-monkeys have been incessantly hounding me about 'timeliness' for days now, so I had Gregory move that shipment of luxury food from Cambridge to New Berlin. From there, a connecting shipment of Rhienlandic 'beverage' (to use the term loosely) was consigned for Liberty. Regrettably this meant traversing the Hamburg system. Awful place. I could feel the oppressive aura of the unemployed from the best part of a lightyear away. Horrendous.

In any event, things took a turn for the better once we reached New York and met the captain of the OSC|Tahiti. Honestly, Gregory makes for such diabolically insipid conversation that I had half a mind to step out an airlock. Yes, Gregory, I'm sure "plasmaball" is a very noble sport, and the "Glasgow Ghosts" are very interesting. Please refrain from explaining how, and reserve such fascinating details for your fellow gutter-snipes. The Tahiti, on the other hand, was helmed by a Marcel Dumas, who appeared to be a gentleman of breeding and standards.

It was ultimately determined that agreeing a verbal avant-courier contractual relationship would be a proper manner in which to proceed. I was happy to help see Dumas and his passengers safely to Shikoku in exchange for modest reparation. That went swimmingly enough (it is a rather pretty place for a holiday), and the quality of conversation rather leavened the mundanity of my day. It was, regrettably, post-completion that matters took a turn for the perturbing. Some strange fellow by name of 'Sin' was nattering over system comms, talking all kinds of nonsense in religious terms. Then the little blighter encountered me outside of Deshima Station and rather tried to do me in! Dreadful!

Raw communications transcript 2303827SHIK1

[23.03.2020 22:08:35] Sin: I wonder I wonder, is this what comradery is amongst Devils?
[23.03.2020 22:09:01] Sin: I shall never know.
[23.03.2020 22:09:28] Sin: But I will do what I must. Through pain, and suffering, this word shall transform.
[23.03.2020 22:09:49] Bowex)Davenport: That does sound like a rather tiresome ideology, it must be said.
[23.03.2020 22:10:14] Sin: Another devil enters the halls of the lord.
[23.03.2020 22:10:27] Sin: Worry not, I shall seek you out too.
[23.03.2020 22:10:33] Sin: Salvation is universal.
[23.03.2020 22:11:02] Sin: There it is.
[23.03.2020 22:11:06] Bowex)Davenport: Oh, yuck. There you are.
[23.03.2020 22:11:25] Sin: As the lord wills it, I shall purify your existence.
[23.03.2020 22:11:31] Bowex)Davenport: Oh, I've heard of you chaps. You're those Liberty fellows who hate tortoises, yes?
[23.03.2020 22:11:35] Sin: Brace yourself, for holy gunfire rarely misses.
[23.03.2020 22:11:37] Sin: Guns up.
[23.03.2020 22:11:43] Bowex)Davenport: Something about shooting arrows at them?
[Weapons fire detected]

The lunatic rather dented up the Davenport, but under my skilled direction, Gregory eventually succeeded in eloping down a trade lane. After that, we saw nothing more of the unpleasant little urchin, so I am happy to draw a line under the whole sorry affair. From there, it was a long journey home through the Taus with Juno Fire Pearls for New London. The route back would have been dreadfully tiresome, but things were kept lively enough by Ms Caitlyn Cross of the OS&C|TE~Red~Velvet~Club, who appears to run this particular branch of OS&C. After escorting her so far as Cambridge, I took my leave and returned home, where I now sit writing this report. I shall end the matter here before I start narrating my narration at which point things would become rather recursive and silly.

Captain Horatio Fairfax Rodney Alfred Bickerton
BES Davenport
Borderworld Exports

I am formally logging concerns about Captain Bickerton's declarations of interests and handling of company funds and assets. The OSC Tahiti paid Captain Bickerton a retainer of $15,000,000 for services rendered, as well as a personal gift of luxury vintage Gallic Wine that exceeded the declarable threshold defined in the Bowex gifts and hospitality policy. I dispute Captain Bickerton's description of payments received as 'modest' and believe there is a plausible suspicion that the full value of any such payment has not been properly declared to our corporate Finances and Income auditors.

Transmission End

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