To: The Unione Corse (UC~) From: Orbital Spa and Cruise (OS&C|)

[Stoner_Steve]

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* ID: James Blackwood, Public Relations Manager
* Location: Planet Curacao

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I couldn't help but notice that you intentionally lowered your encryption protocols and added the Gallic Intelligence Service. Hello you fantastical little spooky fellows. It looks like I'll need to start at the beginning otherwise this conversation will likely look as insane as it is one sided. By the way Pierre, my second favorite piss-head, this explanation is for them not for you, I'll let you know when I need your attention again.

I'll need you to entertain me for a moment while I start over, again. In short one of our Liners was returning from a charter service in the Tau's. Empty I might add. This Liner was held up by an individual by the identification of "UC~Aigle-2" who spent a significant amount of time upselling Planet Marseille, only to then turn around and demand 5 million credits, or else, and I quote, "melt your ship". So after the pirate was paid his demand and everyone went their merry ways. I thought it might be prudent to reach out to the part time pirates and find out why someone would take the time to advertise to a Luxury Passenger Service about visiting their planet only to hold it up afterwards for credits. It just logically doesn't make sense. After some back and forth I believe it is likely because this UC member is a heavy user of the very drugs he claims we distribute.

While I would classify Pierre's misconceptions with Curacao as unhealthy at best, and his obsession with our Chairwoman problematic at worst, I would be happy to direct any Intelligence Service Members to our legal department. Who will undoubtedly pull out something from somewhere that will hold us indemnified from any liability issues that may arise from our guests while planet-side at Curacao.

Which brings us back to the point of this transmission. Pierre darling, this is the part where you can start to pay attention again. If you possess such a character trait. My original three requests still stand, I'm sure you can figure out how to hit a replay incase you already forgot. And please do me a favor, don't respond if you are going to continue to spew your tinfoil hat conspiracies. You'll just embarrass yourself further in front of my new friends in Gallic Intelligence.

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