Brotherhood of terror

[tfmachad]

Balthazzar, reading that I don't know why you were complaining so much about writing. It came out good. Actually, it was an enjoyable read, to be honest. Those snippets did a fair job adding color to your characters.

Now, I'll be honest with you. Ronald let it slip in his last post. I was following the text attentively, but when he went on about adding emotes and internet talk to the text (the "Harvester 17" and "back at Java Station parts) it quickly became a major turn off for me. So much I felt compelled to just skim through what was left of it and get it over with.

I feel strong enough about the use of adverbs in stories, because it is an annoying shortcut out of describing things. Emotes is way worse than that.

The first four posts are very good and interesting. The final half of the last one (#5), unfortunately, is lacking.

All in all, congratulations.

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Meet the Kriegers - The story of a family and of two men that shared more than just a name
Fantasmas de la Nube Siniestra
I Mon'Star: The Strange Case of Elizabeth Wallace