I do not understand anything anymore, really. It has never been this worse. My life feels incredibly surreal right now. I am hiding.
... you probably know that I hired Caliban to help me. You two seem to know each other well.
I, uhm. I asked Kimiko about how you are right now. She is looking after you, so that is good. I talked a bit with her, asked her a few questions. I understand her a bit better now. Or maybe not. I do not know. Every time I talk with her, I feel more and more confused. Somewhat intimidated. Somewhat bedazzled.
Does not matter, though. Everyone and their mother keeps telling me to reach out for Rebecca and you and try to talk. I feel like people think I am exaggerating when I say that she wanted to kill me. That she was almost successful at it. That she is incredibly dangerous. That she is a stalker. That she can find me anywhere, and will kill me. People make it sound like it is my turn. That I should reach out to her.
"Hey Rebecca. Remember the time you almost killed me? Ti-hehehe, that was a good time, right? Let us just forget about that, all is fine! Best friends, right? Buddy buddy? You surely would never again snap out like that and actually kill me? Oh, by the way, I slept with the person you love. Yeah, the person you love does not love you back. That person loves me. But hey, buddy buddy? Great fun, right? That is a nice crowbar you have there-"
This is not going to end well, Kris. There is no way out of this. I need to vanish. I thought I could do it on my own terms, but throwing all my money at Caliban just resulted in him telling me that he will not kill me, it would be against his reputation.
Everyone and their mother tells me he is a dangerous assassin, and yet he did not want to do it. He would just have needed to shoot at me. I would have dropped the shields. He would have gotten the blame, I would be dead, Rebecca would be fine and you two could just have been with each other without any further issues.
I do not know what to do anymore, Kris. I just want it to be over. I left Pittsburgh, I wanted to never feel the things the horrors down there made me feel. Yet I am again fearing for my life. I feel completely lost. It is cold here, people speak a different language and I am at the mercy of someone I barely know.
