GNI/- - Feedback and Index

[Lord Caedus]

Good luck on your officialdom! I don't want to clutter that thread with what is essentially grammar/semantics fixes, so I'll post here some bits.

• "It answers only to the Ministry of Defense, one of the highest representatives of the Gallic Union," - Minister, not Ministry
  
• "The GNI operates a wide number of operatives and vessels alongside Battlecruisers" - the bit about operatives should be cut/restructured
  
• Just beyond that; the sentence describing the Sisteron should be slightly restructured or merged with the prior one
  
• "de facto headquarters of the GNI, as during the various conflicts over time. " - "as" has no place there
  
• "The High Command only responds to the highest echelons of the Gallic Union, as well as Gallic Navy elements more often than not ends up under the command of the GNI," - requires a bit of restructuring and or splitting into multiple sentences
  
• In the MO section, the first two sentences describe the same thing about the GNI's methods using identical wording; requires a bit of restructuring
  
• "Many agents, operators and officials also operate within the Gallic Union under other designations" - operators operate; requires slight rewording
  
• "Virtually no strata of the Union, as well as its civilian population, is not under surveillance. " - requires rewording; "no strata of the Union's military apparatus nor civilian sectors are without constant surveillance and observation."
  
• various "it's" here and there that should be "its"
  
• a lot of "It operates on [...]"; should probably replace it with something else
  
• On the Diplomacy part, neither Ageira nor LSF should be anywhere lower than Unfriendly, if that, as they are the main rivals of the GNI and Union as an entity
  

Whether or not these will make it in is up to the HC's discretion, though I hope I contributed my part. Once again, good luck in your run and I hope to see Gallia (and the Taus) active.

I'm going to go through and clean up the wording on a bunch of this stuff, not to point fingers, but Kherty (and a third party) wrote a decent chunk of it, and the language barrier has made itself known

---