Dr. Travers' explanations gave Mac some peace of mind. The man knew what he was talking about, it was obvious, and was clear that he had dedicated a large part of his professional career to studying the behavior of Gaian animals. She also liked his calm and jovial tone, which allowed her to lose part of the fear she had about the new and strange situation.
The neurologist allowed herself to laugh heartily when Travers expressed doubts that Lucille would willingly agree to an examination of her brain functions. "Oh well, I'm sure this little demon wouldn't stay still for a second." Mac looked at the little fox, who was currently finishing her piece of chicken, and seemed oblivious to the conversation they were having about her. However, something told her that Lucille was not missing a detail of what was happening around. The doctor looked back at Travers with a smile. "It was just a way of speaking. Despite what my status as a person of faith might make you think, I'm actually a tremendously scientific person in general. I like to understand the things that happen around me, and when something stumps me, I usually try to get to the bottom of the matter through scientific evidence, if I can. It's my way of being." She shrugged her shoulders. "That's why I'm glad you were able to shed some light on all this for me. I'm usually a bit scared of things I can't understand."
Mac nodded attentively when Dr. Travers assured her that Gaian animals only made psychic connections to provide support when someone needed it, or to simply offer their love. Lucille had probably noticed that her mood at the moment wasn't very good, and had tried to cheer her up. However, Travers had also said that these bonds were very rare, and Isa had assured her that the little vixen had never tried anything like that with her. So why had she chosen her for this? That was a question she still had no answer to. Wilson looked back at Lucille, who had finished her chicken and was now playing chase with some of the other foxes around the clearing. What had the fox noticed about her? It certainly had to have been more than the momentary sadness she felt when she thought about what the Gauls had done to the Gaian animals.
The neurologist did a bit of personal sincerity exercise. Was she really okay, in general? Well, considering the situation she was living in at Faith Haven, you could say yes, right? She was respected professionally, a true scholar in the field of Neurology, who had also studied some Psychology on her own and had managed to convince the Concilium of the importance of urgent reforms in the field of mental health. She was a valued member of the colony, indispensable for the proper functioning of the health system. Her achievements had been so successful that the Church had agreed to pay so that she could specialize in Psychology, probably in the best place where she could receive knowledge. All of this was indicative of a professional life on a dizzying rise, she really had no reason not to be happy... right?
Mackenzie realized that this was the second time since she had arrived at the Healing Heart that had asked herself if she was happy with her life. She felt a wave of guilt again, and her little voice inside reminded her again that she was not here to have fun or to be happy, but to make the most of the opportunity that the Church had offered her. Besides, the mere fact of serving Deux by receiving knowledge to improve the living conditions of her fellow colonists in Faith Haven should be a reason for complete happiness in itself.
Part of her, most of her sincerely, agreed with that repressive thoughts that were flooding through her head, but this time Mac could see that there was something wrong with her. She had devoted almost her entire life to the Church and to the practice of medicine, and she had done it willingly and happily, because it was what she knew she should do, but that had left her without many other things that she had never been able to experience. Not only the fact that she had never traveled and seen new worlds, but the fact that her total dedication to her professional life and her religious commitment had isolated her greatly from her peers.
Wilson realized that she barely had any friends, and the few she had, like Greta Meyer, had met through work, and mostly she only interacted with them through work matters. She also rarely saw her brother and nephews, and... well, although had never felt the need to have any kind of... romantic relationship with anyone, she wasn't sure if she would have changed her mind if she had more free time. In short, that uneasiness inside her, which was almost crushed under tons of feelings of responsibility and professionalism, saddened her in a certain way, and continuously. Mac realized that it was always there, she had just gotten used to ignoring it. And that feeling was caused by the fact that she felt alone, even though she was always surrounded by other people. All those people respected and appreciated her, but they didn't know her. She rarely gave anyone time to really get to know her, because she never had time for herself.
Mac looked at Lucille once more, and noticed that she had stopped playing and was staring at her, keeping the eyes on her. Was this hidden but perpetual sadness what the little fox had sensed? Could it perhaps be why she had tried to make a psychic connection with her? For a few moments the neurologist was afraid that she would try again, now that that sadness was more evident inside her, but Lucille did nothing except watch her. Perhaps she was able to sense that the doctor was not comfortable with it at the moment?
Wilson snapped out of her thoughts and looked at Isabella as she adressed her with a calm smile. "Well the good thing is that you have more than enough time to figure out your Relationship with Lucille while you learn the Traits of being a psychologist. I think that our Little Troublemaker here wanted to make you smile again and be happy. You can't treat her with human Standards, she is an Animal and dont have any Bad or Hidden Motives for the things that she does."
"Oh, I know..." Mac smiled somewhat nervously. "I never once thought she wanted to do anything bad to me. It's just that... well, a sudden psychic connection with another living being isn't something they train you for in school. Especially when you didn't even know that was possible." She turned to Dr. Travers. "I think I will take you at your word and ask the library for the biography of this Viscount. The personal experience of another person who may have experienced this before will help me to evaluate this in a more informed, and less fearful way."
Her gaze fell on Lucille again, who continued to stare at her. If it weren't for the fact that Mac knew that animals couldn't express emotion with their faces, she would have sworn there was sadness in her eyes. "I'd really like to be able to enjoy this opportunity. Something tells me that this is more of a gift than a danger, but I need to know more. I..."
The vixen ran with a little trot over to Mac, jumped into her lap, and settled down quietly, tucking the head under her arm. That gesture moved the neurologist, despite her doubts, and she ended up smiling, completely disarmed. "Damn, you're as persistent as you are adorable." She shook her head, laughing heartily. "Okay, I'm clear that you want to be friends. If it means that much to you, I won't refuse."
Mac petted Lucille's head for a while until she realized she had fallen asleep. It was obvious that the animal was comfortable with Wilson, although she still wondered what she saw in her to want to bond. Still, she continued to caress her gently, while Travers confirmed that Lucille must surely feel very safe in her company, or else she would never have fallen asleep on her.
Mackenzie turned slightly towards Isa. "Well... and now what? I guess it's best for her to stay in the biodome for now. I can come and visit her every day, in my free time, and when I'm settled in my cabin perhaps she could... move in with me." She looked and made a questioning gesture to Travers. "Would that be possible? I mean, she's a wild animal, I don't know how she can live in a ship's cabin..." She glanced at Saito. "Although... well, the Gaian lynx we saw in Faith Haven lived with that tailor without any problem..." The neurologist made an exasperated gesture, faced with this new and unknown situation before her, which was beyond her control. "Obviously I need to read the book you recommended to me, Dr. Travers, as soon as possible."
