A way to a better self

[Elvinos2003]

Planet Crete / Heraklion / Extremity of the city

It had been a few days since she returned from Ciutadella Outpost. Spending several weeks out there with artificial gravity and no sky had worn her out. She was sitting on a stone near the entrance of Heraklion, kicking some dust with her right foot. ''I'm tired. This...'' She placed her right hand just above her heart. ''This anger... this impulsivity and this hatred... all of this consumes me. The Deterrence... I can't turn the damn page...'' She raised her right hand toward the sky, forming a fist. ''All because of the stupidity they caused... Even if... they outnumber The Brotherhood, I can't stop boiling whenever one of them talks to me. They lack many qualities that a Corsair should have.'' Nina stood up and walked toward the entrance of Heraklion while lifting her hood to cover her head.

While walking aimlessly and avoiding eye contact, her inner self was still boiling, which made Nina place her hand over her heart again. For four damn years, she had been carrying these destructive emotions. It was even more surprising that she hadn't simply died from exhaustion. She eventually found a corner to sit between two buildings of Heraklion, taking some deep breaths to calm the raging storm inside her. ''I need to calm down... I need to focus on something else... at this rate...'' She was suddenly panting, tired of holding all this in. As she showed some weakness, a figure approached her. A man in his late forties, with grey hair and a respectable shape for his age. This man was clearly an active veteran among the Corsairs, or so his aura suggested. ''You... you're certainly not doing well.'' His voice contained a certain warmth, or something similar, inviting perhaps. Her gaze turned to him, her eyes widened, and she felt ashamed to be seen this way. She stood up, almost weak, and leaned against the wall of the building behind her. ''I don't see what you're talking about.'' She replied, trying to act tough as best as she could. But that man clearly saw through her. To her surprise, he stepped closer to her. Again, with that voice, he simply replied: ''Oh, I certainly know what you're going through. You try to act tough despite your actual state. I've seen too many friends go through the same thing, and it killed them in the end.'' He placed himself before her, almost invading her space, just to lift her chin. His brown eyes locked with her crimson ones for a moment. He managed to glimpse Nina's hair despite the hood covering it. He realized who she was but still maintained this expression, a mix of sternness and warmth. With her chin lifted this way, despite her strong will to push him away, she couldn't move. She couldn't believe she was willing to stay still, and despite herself, her cheeks heated with embarrassment. She had never felt this before. A dominance far above her own. ''I know you. You're the one they call the 'Crimson Queen.' The youngest Corsair to reach the Elder title...'' Her cheeks flushed. She couldn't believe it again. This man had an effect on her despite their age difference. After her chin was released, she looked away, annoyed. ''What..? Are you going to say you saw me in such a pathetic state?'' He laughed heartily despite his stern demeanor. He then shook his head. ''No, far from it. Just tell me what's going on.'' He wrapped an arm around her shoulder, urging Nina to walk with him. He led the way to a tavern, taking the lead again, and they headed to a table. He sat in front of her, leaning in to listen. ''So?'' She sighed, annoyed, but she knew she wouldn't be able to get away without talking to this man.

''I... I have been living with this anger, impulsivity, and hatred for four years... I dislike the group The Deterrence with a passion. Their first executor, Ravenna Nagash, made foolish decisions! She dared more than once to discredit The Brotherhood. There was that proclamation she made. She said, and I quote, 'The so-called ''shield and sword'' of the Imperio is now nothing more than what appears to be a small group of simple ruffians interested only in their own benefit. With Pepe Ladron's disappearance, a man whom I've come to respect dearly, the Brotherhood seems to have forgotten any sense of duty or honor.' She is so damn wrong! If I could, I'd give her a solid punch right in the face. After that, there was another similar message. She even stated that the Council of Elders is just self-proclaimed! You surely saw this on the neural net. It was also another message sent to all Corsairs!'' She paused to take a breath before slamming her fist down. ''There was also this other broadcast made by a certain Mateo from The Deterrence, stating they were doing an operation to 'welcome the insurgency' into our damn empire! And those were known to sabotage The Brotherhood's transports. That's what Alberto told me. I just... I just can't start shooting them, can I? I just want... I just want things to be easier to live with... but it's impossible.'' The man listened to Nina's angry speech. He simply nodded in silence, letting the crimson Corsair vent until her lungs hurt. After Nina emptied her heart, he kept looking at her. ''Right... you clearly have a hatred toward them, which I understand. But know that it is totally normal for Corsairs to get frustrated with others. It’s also normal for it to end in a fight, physical or otherwise.'' He pointed at her. ''But you, it's a different story. You can't just punch someone like that because you're an Elder. All I can really suggest is that you channel this energy into battles out there—against Hessians, Outcasts, Nomads, and any other opponents you may face sooner or later. However...'' He paused for a moment, thinking of an idea. ''You could use the Aptera Arena and challenge some of their pilots. That way, you'd be totally within the 'legal' path to kick their butts.'' Listening to his words, Nina felt lighter, as if it were relieving to hear that she could 'legally' kick some of The Deterrence's pilots. She stood up from her seat. ''At least I can use my anger in this... I suppose you want me to thank you? To owe you one?'' He laughed as he stood up. ''Not at all. All I ask is that you apply what I've told you, and if you ever need help again, I'm here.''

Nina Rodriguez and the man parted ways. She was somehow glad she had met him, even though she didn’t know the name of this veteran. Her eyes were burning with something new, determination instead of hate.

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