To: Orbital Spa & Cruise | From: Rheinland Polizei

[rwx]

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Kaiserreichspolizei Rheinland
Encrypted Video Transmission

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Wachmann Rainer Zufall

PRIORITY: Medium
ENCRYPTION: Medium
IDENTIFICATION: Wachmann Rainer Zufall
SOURCE: Planet Curacao, Cortez System
SUBJECT: Re: Erholungsurlaub

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Sehr geehrte Frau Cross,

Your message has been received. I can confirm that all personnel, myself included, have arrived safely and have been assigned to your resort facilities without incident. I am relieved to report that no Synth Paste was served aboard the liner at any time during transit.
After months of subsisting on that grey, sticky substance, the first real meal felt almost like a feast. Please extend my compliments to your chef; whoever is responsible for last night’s dinner deserves a commendation. Rheinland’s Ministry of Nutrition could learn a few things from him (or her), though I would not recommend holding your breath for that.

I am routinely confronted with smiles, polite greetings, and individuals who (alarmingly) appear to be genuinely happy.
One of your employees even asked me, whether I was “enjoying my day.”
I needed a moment to determine, whether it was a threat.

The absence of shouting, metal doors slamming, and prisoners loudly arguing over card games has created a degree of silence that can only be described as suspicious. Some officers from my unit are experiencing similar adjustment strain: one reportedly ducked for cover when a beach attendant approached too quickly with a drinks menu.

It’s almost unsettling how polite everyone here is. I mean, I’m used to a different sort of atmosphere. Back in Spandau, a “Guten Morgen” is usually followed by a disciplinary report, an insult or, on particularly bad days, someone trying to sell you a shiv made out of scrap metal.
Here, though? Here, people greet you like you're their best friend and ask you genuinely, if you're having a “pleasant day.” Just last week, one of your staff asked me if I was enjoying my stay.
I almost didn’t know how to respond. I spent a solid five minutes wondering if it was a trap. But no, they actually seemed genuinely concerned.

Now, I know this seems trivial, but after months of listening to the screams of inmates and being spat at by the Farmer Alliance pirates, this civilian hospitality is jarring, to say the least. And then there are the Unioners who, just the other day, thought, it a good idea to steal my access card. The audacity! Thankfully, the matter was resolved quickly, and my card was returned intact — but it’s a reminder that criminals, regardless of where they are, seem to share a common trait: a complete lack of respect. But even that seems almost normal, compared to how “cordial” everyone is here.

You can’t imagine the disorientation of walking into a bar and being smiled at. It's like I'm on some foreign planet where people actually enjoy their jobs and aren’t constantly looking for ways to make my life miserable. I think some of the officers are experiencing a bit of culture shock too. One of them almost ducked when a beach attendant handed him a drink menu. It’s safe to say that “friendly” is a little too much for us to handle all at once.

On another Topic:
While the meals and most cocktails are acceptable - even enjoyable - I must raise a concern regarding your drink selection. The Plörre called Liberty Ale offered in several of your lounges should not be classified as ale, nor as anything intended for human consumption. I sampled it once.
Once was sufficient.
If that beverage could be called “ale,” I’d be forced to reconsider my entire understanding of the word.

After that experience, I turned to the exotic cocktails - they were better, but still not quite the life-changing experience I was hoping for. Pleasant, yes, but nothing exceptional. It’s all part of the “luxury experience,” I suppose. I remain hopeful that something truly impressive will come my way before the end of this rotation. Until then, I’ll survive on cocktails, despite their lack of galactic awe.

Anyway; as per your instructions, the required payment will be transferred to the account OS&C|Barge.Bank. For your Buchhaltung, the reference code for this transaction will be:

OS&C Bill – 835-104916

I’ve been assured that the transfer will be processed promptly, which, as we both know, typically means “before the next solar cycle concludes.” If they manage to complete it ahead of schedule, I will personally mark the occasion in the station logbook as a milestone in bureaucratic achievement.

My personnel and I will await the arranged return transport once our rotation concludes. Until then, we will continue to do our best to “enjoy our holiday,” as your staff insists.

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Warden Rainer Zufall

Kaiserreichspolizei

Mit freundlichen Grüßen,

Rainer Zufall

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END OF THE MESSAGE

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