Bretonian Armed Forces Defense Intelligence Staff (DIS) (iRP) (AO)

[Athenian]

C-Ward, Florence Nightingale Infirmary, New London.

Well, gents. I am broadcasting this missal from the infirmary as you may have guessed. I imagine the smell of ether and disinfectant is assailing your nostrils even as you read this.

I am confined, unusually enough, not by reason of a crashed ships or as a result of one of my minor "anger coronaries" as the chaps at Admiralty call it.

No, indeed, it appears my bottom has finally given way, and my ongoing martyrdom to the piles has got the better of me.

Now many may blame the lack of fibre in the diet of which I partook all those years serving. Many may point the digit of blame at the more unusal and secretive aspects of peer-enforced discipline in the public school system. Whatever the cause, be it an Etonian Midnight Special or the lashings of cream custard on spotted dick which nourished me throughout my commission, my rear-end has finally waved the pinkish flag of surrender and gone goose over stump.

I fear my days as a combat pilot may be numbered. Plenty of rest and a rather cold and uncomfortable cream to be applied daily by my man-servant are what the doctor has ordered.

In light of this, I shall have to acclimatise myself to continuing to serve Her Majesty in a manner more becoming of an elderly gentlemen. It would be unseemly for me to continue leading the charge on a daily basis into the ranks of the brazen brigands who plague our fair land. I shall therefore be requesting command of a vessel more disposed to the field duties of a ranking officer. I understand the commission of a refitted Gunboat-class vessel may be available, and would deem it a signal honour for the command of the BAF|HMS-Wellesley sharing as it does the name of a fine ancestor of mine, best known for his acts of slaughter against various foreigners of questionable parentage.

For a crew I would have no qualms in requesting the fine chaps who shared that Kusari hell-hole with me during my captivity.

I await the Admiralty's determination on this matter.

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Former member of "the most paranoid group of people in the community"
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