From: Alpha
To: Omega
Re: Everything in between
Source: Kokomo, Planet Manhattan
Time Sent: 0409 hours, Company Clock
Hey! You lot. Yes, you. This is John B, here, and I need a favor.
So here's the situation. I was on vacation, right? So there I was, cruising around in the sloop of mine, and there was this real sweet thing on the shore. A little California surfer girl, she tells me later, and she was riding those waves like... Ooh! She could be surfing Liberty up and down if she wanted to. John squints as if pondering something, God only knows she had curves like-- Oh! That was 'er name! Barbra Ann. Mm.
Oh, well anyways, long story short, I was sitting in my room later that night after I escorted her to her hotel room without making any moves. Being the gentleman that I am, and all. I was sitting there thinking of this little kid named Timmy from when I was a kid. I remember always thinking, "You know, Timmy, when I grow up to be a man, I'll get'cha back for all 'dis". Boy, was he a prick.
So it's when I'm revisiting my youth when I swear I can hear music, and lo and behold it's the sloop's little comm panel pingin' me. Well, shortening the shortened long story, Ageira canned me. Turns out I wasn't allowed to use all my vacation time at once, or sommat. So now I'm thinking, "Gee, Johnny, wouldn't it be nice to feel some good vibrations from a freakin' pistol aimed at d'eir heads?"
So I'm coming to you. For a job opportunity. I can do anything you need me to. I get around, you know? I'll buy one of those shuttle things, a little deuce coup, eh? Badda-bing, badda-boom, I'm at your doorstep ready to start the shootin'! Fun, fun, fun, eh? So what do you say? Give Johnny a chance.
Don't worry, Baby, Johnny's a good guy. You can count on him. Let me know, will ya?
