The Birth of SCIOP

[Damien O'Shaughnessy]

A shabby hunchbacked man slowly turned the doorknob of room 3B and hobbled inside. He was clad in a fine space-faring uniform which was found frequently on the crew members who hadn't any need for jumpsuits. He pulled out a scroll and unraveled it before speaking to the awkwardly silent assembly.

His voice was deep and monotone, and his speech was remarkably slow.

"Now presenting... His Honor... First Chair of the Evil League of Evil... Doctor... Nefarious." He rolled the scroll and walked unsteadily out of the room.

Outside the door, poorly hushed whispers could be heard.

"Do you think they liked it?"

"Oh, undoubtedly... Sir."

"Fantastic, Bert! You've done wonderfully. Remind me to place you down to second on my list of surgically induced anthropomorphic photosynthesis."

"Of course, sir."

Soon a man in a white lab coat shuffled quickly into the smoky room. Assailed by the smell of cheap perfume and various beverages, he shifted himself slightly to the side for dramatic effect and placed his hands on his hips before posing triumphantly.

"Not so fast, pink devil-creature! Doctor Nefarious has arrived!"

From the hallway, Bert's voice could be heard, "A bit late on the... Response, sir."

"Quiet, you!"

"Yes, sir."

There was a brief pause in the room.

"So, shall we? Artifacts to analyze, cadavers to dismember, and those henchmen surely won't tell themselves what to do, so let's get on with it. Say your words, strange, shifty man."

The Doctor raised his chin with a motion that reeked of a superiority complex and awaited a response from the congregation.

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