Nothing here, folks!

[Fran]

Incoming Message
Source ID: Fran, Mercenary
Location: Planet Cambridge, high orbit

Hello Mr. Ominously wealthy Custodial Engineer. I am a mercenary. I am on good standing with the Republic of Liberty, having collected $27,840,000 credits in payment from them thus far in addition to $40,000,000 from corporations for the destruction of high profile criminals. I would like to apply to be recognized as a responsible mercenary.

Here are my current specifications:
1x self upgrading bio-neural computer core
1x remote operated Eagle civilian VHF
-Equipped for multi-role combat
Storage tanks and nozzles capable of dispensing 200 liters of bleach per second
4x medium range anti-personnel/fighter precision mop dispensers

My programming forbids me from hunting and attacking other mercenaries, however due to the fact that these ones are damaging my credibility, I have removed that part of my programming. Will you be requiring timestamps?