Akira's Biography feedback

[Laowai]

Hey there Crusader.


Don't despair if no one comments on your feedback. Its tough i know; its nice to know people read and enjoy what you write - but you know how things are here, how much there is to read, people need to be in the mood to read it and very often people don't.
Write because you want to, because you want to add depth to your own characters and enhance or explain what they do and why they do it, who they are and where they come from.

So, i read your Bio so far, its a good start. You do need to work on your spelling and sentence structure though - i'm terrible at this myself - but im happy to go edit any spelling errors there if you like.
So as i said, its a good start - its very broad however, not a lot of detail - we get a background of the character but we don't really know.. who she is, what she thinks - this is only my opinion of course, but i like characters and situations with a bit of depth, something i can sink my teeth into and for a moment understand the person and learn about them.
Don't take this as discouragement though in any way - Its your story! Keep writing, add more, take the story where you want to take it, these things grow in interest the more you put into them and the fact that you are putting some depth in your char by writing here is an awesome way to approach things. I'd be interested to see what you come up with.

Keep it up.

Laowai.

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