Comm ID: Brakelatabasaasta
Transmit to: Brakelatabasaasta
I'm back! Returned from my amazing and amazingly un-documented trip all around Sirius! Bert and I are back to the Liberty place, in the New Yorky space. What was once our cage-home, is now just a home-home. No more cagey-ness involved! Except for... Jen-hunny. But I've only seen her once since I got back. Briefly. Hopefully I'll be able to keep a safe distance from her. Oh, Jenny... she still thinks we actually got married! But I went all "ABORT!" before we got to the marry-part, and everything went crazy... fish, man, that whole ceremony was a mess. Nothing went right, except for my escape. And even that was only temporary... well, I'm talky-talking too much about nonsensical sense-making nonsense. On to the fun!
I woke up this morning to find Bert ON FIRE again. So what do I do? Well, I was certainly a bit calmer about it this time. I respectfully requested aid from the good people of... that place. But little did I know I'd end up chatting with a Holy-fish-guy today!
Brakelatabasaasta: Excuse me, good sirs and female sirs of the New York system... Brakelatabasaasta: Would one of you mind... Brakelatabasaasta: Extinguishing my firey-bits? Fish-N-Ships: Rothwell: Female sirs? What are you on, kid? Brakelatabasaasta: OH FISH. Brakelatabasaasta: It's a Fishman! Messenger from on high! Fish-N-Ships: Rothwell: I'm no fisherman you idiot! I'm a Ship Parts salesman! Fish-N-Ships: Rothwell: You high on the Orange stuff or summin'? Brakelatabasaasta: Well you see, sir... or female sir... it's not quite so simple. Brakelatabasaasta: Allow me to explain: Brakelatabasaasta: I am a Brakelatabasaasta. Brakelatabasaasta: And you are a Fishman. Brakelatabasaasta: Therefore... Brakelatabasaasta: FISH.
The Fishman seemed unaware of his own position in the Fishverse. I was going to explain to him just what made him the Fishly Fishmangod that he was, but then, a distraction!
Cindy_Snow: And I am a female sir. Brakelatabasaasta: Hi hi, Female sir! Cindy_Snow: Hi male sir.
Cindy Female Sir was all, "WhooOOOOoooah!" And I was all, "Ka-plooOOOOOooo?" And we danced the dance of Kings and Men while I softly cried and played my tiny trumpet. And the fires went out.
But it was over quickly.
Because the greatest, meanest, nastiest man in the whole wide 500-meter radius had appeared to ruin our day. He claimed to be a Pleesm'n, but I didn't believe him.
tie3: you sound like youre on drugs but youre not.... Cindy_Snow: No, male sir. tie3: hmmmmmmm tie3: call me sir Brakelatabasaasta: Mmm... no. I'll call you Dan. Cindy_Snow: Cal me Sir Cindy female. Brakelatabasaasta: Yessir, Sir Cindy Female Female Sir! tie3: you get charged a fdee for diserespecting me? tie3: call me sir Brakelatabasaasta: What was that, Dan? I couldn't hear you over the sound of how DAN you are. Cindy_Snow: I'd hate to be Dan. Brakelatabasaasta: I know, right? tie3: call me sir or else.... Cindy_Snow: Or else Dan. tie3: so youre silent? Brakelatabasaasta: What, Dan? WHAT DO YOU WANT?!
Yeah. Dan sucked. No one liked Dan. He went all "I'm gonna leave now" And we were all "Fine, Dan, go away" but then he didn't! Man. What a fishstick.
Oh! And Fishgodman heard me yakkity-yakking, and got all fake-angry about it.
Fish-N-Ships: Rothwell: Do you want me to shoot you? Brakelatabasaasta: Shoot? With the goodness and holiness of the Fishlord? Brakelatabasaasta: Please! Fish-N-Ships: Rothwell: Someone take him home. Sheesh. Brakelatabasaasta: I dun wanna go to my Dumpsterhome yet! Fish-N-Ships: Rothwell: Someone take him home or shoot him! Just shut it up! tie3: im bored..... Cindy_Snow: Shut it, Dan.
Dan kept going on about harrassment and was going all like "Stop calling me Dan!" And Cindy and I were all "But that's your name, Dan!" And he got madder and madder and exploded into a cloud of... well, no. He didn't explode. But that would have been cool. One can dream...
And then, calamity! Dan got so angry, he transformed into a pirate! He went all "Gimme money now!" It was quite a sight to unbehold. Explosions happened.
tie3: cindy give me 10k for harrsing an LP Cindy_Snow: I'm not harassing you. tie3: you keep on calling me dan i told you to stop Brakelatabasaasta: Shut up, Dan. Cindy_Snow: He's harassing me about harassment. tie3: now hand it over.. or else Cindy_Snow: But you're Dan. Cindy_Snow: WHAT? Death: Cindy_Snow was put out of action by tie3 (Gun). Brakelatabasaasta: NOW WE SEE THE TRUE COLORS OF THE PLEESMEN! Brakelatabasaasta: And that color... is blue! Brakelatabasaasta: You bastard, Dan! Cindy_Snow: What the Dan? Brakelatabasaasta: Yeah, Dan! What the Dan?!
Cindy-person-sir went BOOM and Dan was the BOOM-causer! Words cannot express my anger over this. But a picture can!
Note: The fine gentleman in this picture is not Brakelatabasaasta.
Luckily, some real pleesm'n-type of guys came around before I could get any angrier.
LCBO|-Dan_Renolds: Something going down LNS? LNS-BB16-Tumwater: Anna Lee: Who killed Cindy? Brakelatabasaasta: Dan blew up Sir Female Cindy Female Female Sir! Brakelatabasaasta: It was TERRIBLE!
And actally, a lot of other stuff happened then, all of it talky-talking. It was boring, with accusations and finger-calling and name-pointing... "He blew me up and took my cargo!" "She disrespected me by calling me Dan!" "You're a no-armed marsupial with soap-for-brains and a toothbrush stuck in your nose!" Finally, with my explanation-help, the Navyguys started to sort things out.
And then I realized something. Ther was a real Dan on the scene! Oh, the confusion he was faced with...
LNS-BB16-Tumwater: Anna Lee: Attention, Dan, distance yourself from Cindy, specifically two klicks. LCBO|-Dan_Renolds: *Screatches his head* Im so confused here Brakelatabasaasta: OH fish. Brakelatabasaasta: There's a "real" Dan here! Brakelatabasaasta: Real Dan, there's already a Dan here. Brakelatabasaasta: So we'll call you... Ted. Cindy_Snow: Can I be Marty? Brakelatabasaasta: Sure. Brakelatabasaasta: Marty, Ted, and... ugh. Dan.
With that sorted, it was back to business.
LCBO|-Dan_Renolds: Alright LCBO|-Dan_Renolds: Some one tell me what the hell is going on here Brakelatabasaasta: Mister Renolds, your name is now Ted. Brakelatabasaasta: That's Understand-thing Nuber 1. Brakelatabasaasta: And tie3 is Dan. Cindy_Snow: That Mr. Police Man Dan Stole 4 units of my Light Arms, and raped me earlier, now he wants 10k. tie3: itd was consficated Cindy_Snow: I feel so dirty. Cindy_Snow: *Cries* tie3: CINDY STAY AWAWY OR ILL OPEN FIRE LNS-BB16-Tumwater: Anna Lee: No you won't. Cindy_Snow: You're supposed to be 2 klicks away from me. Brakelatabasaasta: Marty speaks truths.
But a newcomer approaches! Will he be an asset? Or... a non-asset?!
Well, as it turns out, he just starts this whole mess of names and newnames and nonnames and pseudonames.
=LSF=Jason_Booth: What the hell is going on here? Brakelatabasaasta: Jason! We don't already have a Real Jason... but you need a new name anyway! Brakelatabasaasta: So... Jason is now... Anna. Cindy_Snow: Then who is Anna? LNS-BB16-Tumwater: Anna Lee: What. LCBO|-Dan_Renolds: Cindy Brakelatabasaasta: FISH! We ALREADY HAVE an ANNA! Cindy_Snow: Oh, there we go. Brakelatabasaasta: Anna, you're now Will. Brakelatabasaasta: SO. Brakelatabasaasta: tie3 = Dan. Cindy = Marty. Dan Renolds = Ted. Jason = Anna. Anna Lee = Will. Brakelatabasaasta: We all clear? .:j:.Corpulent.Corvus: But my name is Will. Brakelatabasaasta: Wait... Brakelatabasaasta: We have a WILL, TOO? Brakelatabasaasta: Man! Will, your name is now... Toby! Cindy_Snow: Or that'll work. Fish-N-Ships: Rockwell: You all set now? Brakelatabasaasta: tie3 is now Dan. Dan is now Ted. Cindy is now Marty. Jason is now Anna. Anna Lee is now Will. Will is now Toby. NOW we're clear.
But no, we weren't clear. It took A LOT more talking and boring chattering before we were "clear". The real-real Navyguys found out that Pleesman Dan did, indeed, splow up Marty/Cindy and steal her cargo. So when Pleesman Dan refused to return the space-boxes, Navyguys went all "Take it by force!" And started a lightshow! I yelled out my terrible battlecry:
Brakelatabasaasta: I'M HELPING I'M HELPING.
And I joined the show! Which... lasted a few minutes. Pleesman Dan was really jump-jumpy and Bert was all "I can't keep up!" So Pleesman Dan got away. The Real-real Navyguys went all "We're putting an arrest warrant on Dan" and left. Which just left Marty/Cindy.
Brakelatabasaasta: So. Did Female Sir Marty get his-her cargo back? Cindy_Snow: No... Brakelatabasaasta: Oh. I was hoping for a "yes", to which I could reply, "my work here is done", which would have been a good excuse to exit... Brakelatabasaasta: But now I have to rethink my exit-strategy. Brakelatabasaasta: Um. Brakelatabasaasta: Yeah... bye! Cindy_Snow: Bye!
And then I went back to my Dumpsterhome and had a big, tasty brunch with the Fishgodman. There were cinnamon buns and snails. It was lovely. THE END.
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Comm ID: Brakelatabasaasta
Transmit to: That Barry Guy... Himself!
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