I can haz skype

[Durandal]

[5:32:44 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): I almost got a tattoo.
[5:32:53 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): And did a drunken dive off a table.
[5:32:59 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): That was an...amusing story.
[5:33:32 AM] Justin 'Baughlrupxwermb' Hopkins: What.
[5:33:33 AM] Justin 'Baughlrupxwermb' Hopkins: xD
[5:33:38 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): Okay.
[5:33:48 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): I was at a party with some friends.
[5:33:56 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): They were drinking, smoking, and being rowdy.
[5:34:03 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): I was on my sixth beer.
[5:34:17 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): And this tiny little Mexican girl sits next to me.
[5:34:17 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): Yeah.
[5:34:24 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): And I start hitting on her.
[5:34:35 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): She actually found me amusing, so I kept my chatter going.
[5:34:52 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): In order to prove myself a worthy mate, I decided to give her a display of agility!
[5:35:03 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): Quite drunkenly, I jumped up onto a chair.
[5:35:06 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): She was impressed.
[5:35:15 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): I took it further and jumped onto the table.
[5:35:30 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): What I didn't know was that some one spilled a beer there.
[5:35:50 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): And my boot hit the puddle, lost traction, and slipped forward like in the cartoons.
[5:36:10 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): And then I hit the dry patch of the table and my boot regained traction, stopping instantly.
[5:36:16 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): My body, however, did not.
[5:36:34 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): And like a pendulum, I swung over and crashed my face into the carpetnolium.
[5:36:38 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): I thought I was going to die.
[5:36:42 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): So there I lay.
[5:36:47 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): In a puddle of my own faceblood.
[5:37:00 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): I decided to give a dying speech.
[5:37:04 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): To commemorate the moment.
[5:37:22 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): I proudly announced in a fit of crying laughter, "AWNDVAWDB AWDVFAWFA FWNDAWFVAW!"
[5:37:39 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): Spent the night in a hospital.
[5:37:45 AM] Jacob Antis (Shagohad): The end.