Incoming Transmission
Sender: Major Albert Knowles
Recipient: Hellfire Information Dumps, Fort Leniex
Subject: Of Docs and messed up people.
[color=#663366]Good evenin' comrades, higher ups, and related bazoozle. You are to blame for me extended absence. Now, before ya bust an ulcer, lemme speak.
So I was cleanin' up the Sabre when this lad runs up to me and says...."Yer a Major now". That gave me so much of a shock, I had an immediate ulcer. Damn that hurt. That guy was watchin' me all surprised while I rolled on the floor in pain, not amusement. Then the dimwit finally got the idea and got the damn doctors. Goddamn. I've avoided docs all my life, and they finally have at me.
Turns out both my kidneys are a stone's throw away from failin', My Liver's doin' somersaults and buddying up to my stomach, and my Heart's expandin' with love. I told 'em that was normal for me, but they didn't listen, and replaced half my damn body.
I feel so wierd to have a functioning body again. Give me some time while I go test it out at the bar. [color=#000099]End Transmission
