Texas Separatists - Information & Feedback

[Binski]

Good back story. I like the idea of a Texas separatist faction. It does seem like a good opportunity to go for terrorist ID's (perhaps after some build up). In the very worst case you could simply use a Pirate ID and have more inrp options when dealing with other quasi and unlawful factions. That's not unrealistic for a group of freed criminals. A xenos ID will guarantee you enemies with hackers, rogues and Junkers. In Texas, that's not a very practical stance to take. Go a more neutral route ID wise and you might get some local support. You could almost act like an unlawful vigilante squad, as a sort of counter balance to the LPI (due to the corruption). You could do a lot diplomacy wise if you play you're cards right.

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[Swifty]

Oh jesus... here we go again *facepalm*

Edit: Let's be serious now. The idea of Texas separatists faction is pretty good. But like Unforgiven said

You could do a lot diplomacy wise if you play you're cards right.

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[Echo 7-7]

A few points:

1) Dark red text on a black background is not very easy to read. Pick something a little bit easier on the eyes.

2) Character name "Jack Raynor", picture of Jim Raynor from Starcraft - use the name or the picture, not both, or it looks like you're copying that character into Discovery, which is somewhat lacking in originality.

3) The story is lacking in continuity, particularly in terms of explaining the motivation for the group's actions.

i) "Rehabilitated prisoners" would suggest that they have already done their time and are free people. Slavery is outlawed in Liberty, and indentured servitude is still relatively uncommon. Ex-criminals being employed probably would not get amazing working conditions, but they still have to be treated humanely. Labour as part of the gaol sentence usually occurs on board either of the two LPI prison stations in Texas, not on the planet's surface.

How large is this group supposed to be? Dozens, hundreds, thousands?

ii) "As they worked in factories, they could collect the tools and equipment bit by bit."
Tools and equipment for what? How did they collect it?

iii) "They also contacted a group well known to despise the corruption of Liberty: the Hellfire Legion."
How? One does not simply send a message to Vespucci.
Why contact the Legion and why do they also think Liberty is corrupt? Simply being angry at a harsh gaol sentence does not suggest that the system is corrupt. Consider also that the Legion is attempting to take a more ideological stance, and motives based purely on greed or revenge might not fit in very well.

iv) "A larger metal ingot shipment arrived to the planet, on several transports. The workers took action. They stormed the government building of the city, taking out the Police guards and capturing their armory."
How does a shipment of metal have anything to do with an uprising?
How can a group of criminals storm a government building successfully? You're describing yourselves as thugs, not military commandos.

v) "From that a whole city wide riot spread out."
How does an attack on a government building start a riot? If anything, the deployment of more law enforcement to a hostile scenario should prevent a riot from escalating.

vi) "The rebels captured 3 ships in the attack, and headed off planet."
What kind of ships and how did they escape? Think back to the vanilla campaign - Trent and Juni barely escaped Manhattan in two nimble fighters because of reinforcements from a Cruiser squadron and its escorts.

vii) "A Rheinland attack was under way, so most of the Navy stationed in Texas was on patrol in Hudson and Bering."
If an attack is under way, then ships are going to be recalled from patrols to counter-attack. Clarify what you mean here. Consider also that the Battleship Mississippi is on permanent assignment to Planet Houston and always has a full complement of fighters/bombers on board.

viii) "The rebels were escorted to Fort Leniex, where the Legion commanders listened to their story, and offered their help to achieve their goal: to free all unjustly slaved people on Texas, and eventually liberating the system fom Liberty control."
Who is enslaved? Where are they? Why are they slaves?
Receiving aid is different than becoming members of the Legion, which might sugges that a different ID is more suitable. Separatism is also not the Legion's goal; they are trying to achieve a stronger, pure, but united Liberty. Sirius' extensively interlinked economy makes separatism an economically challenging scenario - downright unviable in some cases. The Liberty government and its corporate, private, and public backers would not let you get away with it easily.

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There was a sig here, once.

[Switchback]

Jim Raynor did this, Jim Raynor did that. Something I've noticed with factions. Sure its great to have a figurehead leader that pushed the group to overcome [insert obstacle here], but having him do all the work makes it sound like one hell of a mary sue character and a bit like he's Mr. Unstoppable. Nobody likes Master Chief Powerarmor super god men.

And usage of the Hellfire Legion ID. I'm sorry, but it sounds like you just wanted a reason to use the HF Assets. Additionally, your using their ID but have them under "Friendly", not "Allied"? Hey lets give fighters, bombers, and lots of guns so they can not help us when we need it. If anything, just use Liberty and Generic Civilian tech. You can say the HF gave it to you, but I don't think in-lore they can exactly spare tons of ship and support equipment for a rebellion movement that doesn't exactly align with their goals.

Now don't get me wrong. Its an interesting idea, opens up quite a few RP opportunities. Start off petitioning the Liberty Government, protest, then go all violent shooting and stuff. But currently it seems more like you just want a pocket faction to call your own. Everyone has done it, and in the vast majority of cases it doesn't work out as they planned.

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Power does not corrupt. Fear corrupts... perhaps the fear of a loss of power.

[Ponge]

Being in General discussions, this post is intended to gather feedback on whether this faction is viable on the server at all or not. Detals can be worked out later.
The whole "criminals working on Houston" thing is based on this:
"Houston's biggest industry, however, is fuelled by Liberty's criminal element; the vast majority of Libertonian prisoners are housed in the system and prison gangs from the Huntsville and the Sugarland, as well as rehabilitated former inmates looking to go straight, power Texan industries."

The fact that slaves are sold on Pittsburgh, a lawful planet, suggests that the authorities are involved to a degree on this, due to the corruption in LPI/LN. In Liberty, those slaves can come from the prisoners sold as slaves by corrupted officials, can't they?

The ID change to Xenos is also a viable idea.

How about changing the "prisoner rebellion" thing into "workers kept under slum conditions rebel" thing?

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[Evo]

Xenos don't want Texas to be taken over and made something that's not Liberty. A regime overthrow the HF aims for is different. Count us as hostile if you wish to make a new nation in Texas.

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[Huursa]

Ty for the feedback gg(Guys & Girls) the Xenos ID will make LR and LH hostile and this will be problem i still suggest to stick with the HF ID . About how far is Vespucci from Texas well look here http://i.imgur.com/x6wag8p.png and ye only 2 systems Humboldt and Puerto Rico not far at all .
@Echo 7-7 - About the name if i use Jim Raynor will be total copycat so using Jack Raynor makes it less copycat , about the history we will try to expand it . You asked how much are the separatists well they are thousands .

@Switchback - As i said everything in this thread is under construction i added HF as friendly cuz im not sure are they going to help iRP and inGame .

@Evo - We are not new nation evo , we are just ex-slaves and ex-prisoners from the texas system who want to liberate the system from this slavery,coruption and maybe end of the Liberty-Rheinland battlefield in Texas . Won't look good to shoot liberty citizens huh?

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[Ponge]

Puerto Rico is Junker Guard system, and hostile to HF, do not consider it as a viable route to travel.

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[Evo]

@Evo - We are not new nation evo , we are just ex-slaves and ex-prisoners from the texas system who want to liberate the system from this slavery,coruption and maybe end of the Liberty-Rheinland battlefield in Texas . Won't look good to shoot liberty citizens huh?

I must've misread that while skimming, then. My b. I would seriously reconsider shooting up Liberty forces on basically the front lines of a war, though. They're what defend Liberty civilians from getting murdered by krauts and the bad government we have being replaced by an even worse one. Tbh I don't remember what HF's views on that were, perhaps contact someone from there since this faction emulates it basically.

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[Astraea]

the Xenos ID will make LR and LH hostile and this will be problem i still suggest to stick with the HF ID .

Hey genius, if you bothered to check you'd find LR and LH are ALSO hostile to HF. So if your plan to be neutral or friendly with rogues and Hackers, that aint going to happen.

If you want to be all cool with them, then use hacker or Rogue ID.

You really havent done your research have you?

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It's not every day that I read about Somali pirates pirating a US navy aircraft carrier in their speedboats.