To the Bretonian Public

[Seth Karlo]

[Incoming Transmission]
[ID: Serena Kithe]
[]

Enough is enough.

Salazar has now been missing for over two weeks, with no word, no sign, and no response to our hails. Because of this, I am henceforth taking command of our fleet.

I have... suspicions that Salazar may have been captured by your pathetic excuse for a government, and they are only suspicions, for it is hard for me to imagine them managing to capture anything at all, let alone manage to hide a dreadnought from me for 2 weeks.

Believe me, I shall know if it is destroyed.

Now, Leeds has been... targeted for some time. Some of you may have noticed the women and men being kidnapped, reappearing in the woods, their eyes burnt with acid and their mouths spilling with tales of rape and torture.

This is what you can all expect Bretonians, until I receive proof that Salazar is either not in your governments clutches, or he is returned to me.

While you may or not have him, we shall continue to strike until we received confirmation of either.

(Also, Admiral Nelson, Admiral Hobart, you'll find two of your maids (one each) in their rooms, drowned in oil. We decided to send each of you a... personal message. A shame they had to work for you.)

Serena

[Transmission ends]

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Signature by Sleipnir.

[Incindre]

Incoming Transmission...
ENCRYPTED
Priority: Low
From: New Scotland Yard: Commander Lucy Silsbury
To: Serena Kithe
Subject: Phantom Threats

Unfortunately for me it appears that this has shifted from department to department and this morning it appeared on my ‘To Do’ list.
I labeled it “Send cutting and derogative reply to delusional and unintelligent terrorist” and put it at the bottom of my priorities.

Your transmission was jammed very early on, MI5 reviewed it and deemed it not a threat and tasked a response. However if neither MI5, the BAF, The Chief Commissioner of the BPA or any of the Superintendants will deal with this then it falls to me to inform you where you went wrong.

Firstly: No. No we have not heard any tales of men and women being kidnapped and tortured.

Leeds has been the industrial powerhouse of Bretonia for scores of years and as such has become rife with pollution. This is because every square inch has been built on.
Even if there was space for these ‘Woods’ that you say abductees appear in, it would be impossible for any plant life to flourish.

Secondly, the government has nothing to do with the capture of enemies of the Empire.
The BPA have full control there.
And to your slight on the efficiency of said government, you are not at will to speculate having only been in contact with the self inflated and hopelessly inept assistant secretary to the private secretary to the permanent under secretary of state for the Foreign Office… Miss Lafiel Tarrant, a foolish girl whose words and actions count for nothing.

So we have asserted a few things here.

A. You are fool
B. This threat is meaningless and without foundation
C. We will not give you ANY information on your terrorist father
D. You are a terribly misinformed fool
E. You are done wasting my time

Have you considered that your father asked for protective custody in order to maintain distance between himself and his dull, unimaginative and embarrassing offspring?

Please, in order to save me more paperwork, make sure your next threat has more substance. That way it may be dealt with higher up in the Chain of Command.

Good day

Commander Lucy Silsbury MBE, Bretonia Police Authority

Transmission End...
NSY CommChannel Status: CLOSED

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Currently Retired

Signs and Portents

[Seth Karlo]

[Incoming Transmission]
[ID: Serena Kithe]
[]

*Giggles*

Ahh, the BPA. Always thinking they're important and powerful.

Your ignorance is so amazing it astounds me. If you wish, I can provide pictures of the 9 victims we have... used... so far, the local police could probably provide you with the reports. Another blatant show of ignorance is your belief that I am my daughter.

I am the wife of Salazar, not his daughter. I would think that a BPA officer could read reports. Apparently not. Shame.

So:

A. You are fool

A matter of opinion. I too think you are a fool, proof is above.

B. This threat is meaningless and without foundation

If you wish to ignore a threat this large, and pretend it doesn't exist, I again say you are a fool. Fools ignore what they fear, and try to destroy what they do not understand.

C. We will not give you ANY information on your terrorist father.

Husband. I have since learned he is with some lovely beings known as 'Keepers'. Something about working with them, isn't that nice?

D. You are a terribly misinformed fool

Am I? You seem to be a terribly ignorant fool. Or perhaps an idiot.

E. You are done wasting my time

Never. I shall always be here to waste your time, it amuses me.

Oh, and one final thing Miss Silsbury, if MI5 blocked this transmission, why are you sending the reply without any sort of encryption? Also, you'll find several areas of forest on Leeds, mainly in parks and other areas that have undergone rejuvenation as an attempt to improve the suburbs of some of the larger cities.

Good day.

Serena

[Transmission ends]

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Signature by Sleipnir.

[Shrui Ken]

[Incoming Transmission]
[]
[Transmission ID: Siona Kithe]

Oh Lucy dear, are you talking to me or my dear mother?

Perhaps one day... you and I can spend some... quality time together...

*Smiles*

[Transmission ends]

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[Incindre]

Incoming Transmission...
Priority: Low
From: New Scotland Yard: Commander Lucy Silsbury
To: Serena Kithe
Subject: Ignorance

This is becoming rather annoying. I am a busy woman with stuff to do.
Almost all of your communiqu?s have been dealt with by the BAF sending a resounding No to any of your requests or threats.

Here at the hub I am presented with two people, both of similar appearance, name, desires and intelligence (or lack thereof) and I am hard pressed to tell the difference. Although I may look at the reply for a laugh I do not and will not familiarize myself with either of you until you pose anywhere near as much of a threat as the current organizations I am dealing with.

I am curious as to how you expect us to take you seriously if we constantly have to refer to reports to tell you apart! I would, in your shoes, consider a name change by E-pol.
I must say, in a year with the BPA I have not heard of either of your exploits. The exploits of your father/husband/relative were before my time and indeed the closest the Kithe family have got to being a problem was sitting and talking to Lafiel Tarrant.
This could only be problematic by her endangering herself but no, you left, and we all carried on.

I also fail to see how you could kidnap the maids of The Admiralty, drown them in oil and then put the bodies in the rooms of their employers!
The houses of such important people are not just guarded by a locked door, if you could manage such a feat it would be quite impressive not to mention almost impossible.

Reading your explanation for these woods that you continue to insist exist; I assume you mean the bio-domes to provide the inhabitants with food and recreation. Again it would be quite a feat to steal a person and then insert them into a Bio-dome among the few trees that grow there.
They hardly constitute a wood Mrs. Kithe.

Now, I do not expect you to understand the intricacies of a police officer,( I do not wish to make your underpowered head hurt), but an officer in the BPA will only devote so much time to a pointless exercise before moving onto something of more substance.
I will reiterate what I said before.

Come back when you have something more substantial, this story has so many holes in it that it could be a container of washers!

Now. Both of you are done wasting my time.

Good Night

Commander Lucy Silsbury MBE, Bretonia Police Authority


Transmission End...
NSY CommChannel Status: CLOSED

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Currently Retired

Signs and Portents

[Seth Karlo]

[Incoming Transmission]
[ID: Serena Kithe]
[]

Miss Silsbury,

I understand that you have to maintain a brave face for the public, and to keep your own ego afloat. I know, most of you manage it. I see no problem with this. You are a professional, and your appearance is paramount to how people treat you.

The problem here is that unlike a good police officer, you are not checking the facts. I think you'll find if you check the Admiral's offices, that the maids that clean said offices are both dead.

You'll also be able to find reports about mine and Salazars... exploits... in those biodomes.

However, again, you must keep face. If you wish to deny that which has happened, you are welcome to do so. All I have left to say to you is thus:

Always keep an eye open dear.

Serena

[Transmission ends]

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Signature by Sleipnir.

[BaconSoda]

Incoming Transmission...
Origin: The Hub
Subject: The Snark

Ms. Kithe,

Clearly put, this was ignored because we don't care. We don't care about your illusion of a fleet, its leadership, or your husband's mother's roommate's twice-removed mailbox. What we do care about is credible threats to our empire, such as the Kusari, the Corsairs, or, ironically as to the subject of Commander Silsbury's message, the Phantoms. You seem to fail at this credibility thing, mostly because we don't really feel that threatened by strippers, adult actors, or ladies of the night. Maybe if you would send an image that shows you as something that is not one of these things, we might chuckle a little less after reviewing the message.

Furthermore, trying to deflate the ego of professional servicemen is rather daft. It's our job to let our egos go and serve the public. I like to think I rely on no aspects ego or id at all and rather rely completely on the aspects of my superego and I'd like to think this about the rest of my constables as well. In your case, however, it seems to be quite the opposite. Maybe if you stopped replacing your cracked bathroom vanity for five minutes of the day, you could compose a reasonable argument, but, as your bathroom vanity is such a significant part of your occupation, I somehow doubt such a thing is possible.

So, basically, try not to hurt yourself formulating a response. But, I must congratulate you: you did get the definition of wood correct, technically, but, Commander Silsbury is right when she says that wood and a wood. I know your boss would be quite cross if you failed to occupy that street corner when not already employed, but, a little education can go a long way.

~Police Commissioner Douglas Palmer

Transmission Closed.

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[8:32:45 PM] Dusty Lens: Oh no, let me get that. Hello? Oh it's my grandma. She says to be roleplay.
[12:49:19 AM] Elgatodiablo: You know its nice that you have all that proof and all, Bacon... but I just don't believe you.