Just started using Twooter.
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I made a poo.
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All our resources have been delegated to the search for Countess Tarrant. We've found 2 Rogue bases in as many days but no sign of her. Makes one wonder if we...
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...hadn't found them before due to laziness. MI6 has produced even less and is actually accusing us of not taking this issue seriously. Frikin' crumpet munchers.
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More communiques have been exchanged between LSF and Navy in the last 3 days than the last 2 months combined. The Navy and LSF didn't used to communicate well.
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It wasn't until the infamous Sarrah Willows incident that an over-stressed Admiral Hale forcibly broke down the walls in a rage like Onizuka with a hammer.
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Since then, cooperation has been great. Hale is best admiral ever.
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Janet from R&D says they're working on the potential safety application of specially designed eye-shields. They hope the fancy eyewear will increase pilot-survival rate in the event of accidentally entering a sun's corona.
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Janet says they'll be field-testing the new eye gear later today.
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A funeral will be held for Joe on Thursday. Everyone at R&D is fretting over their calculations. Seems the goggles do nothing.
*puts on fedora and trenchcoat* Now I know what sort of community you really are. *walks off into the rain*
At the bar on Manhatten. Sometimes I wonder why there's only one bar on Manhatten.
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Just met a Kusari girl named Jun Wata-something. She let me buy her a drink. Things are going well.
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Damn this girl is fine. She thinks I'm funny. We're heading back to her place.
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It was a trap. Time for lots of beer and forgetting.
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Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?
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Woah. I must have been totally wasted when I wrote that last twoot.
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Janet from R&D says one of our recons in the Omicrons brought back some Nomad artifact spheres.
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Just spoke with Janet. They concluded that the balls are inert. They're sending them to a museum on Manhatten.
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*puts on fedora and trenchcoat* Now I know what sort of community you really are. *walks off into the rain*
1) Capture A.D.M.I.N. 2) ?????? 3) Profit!
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George got captured by HIS OWN PARTY VAN! HAHAHAHA! Promotions for me!
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Just found a site called Tvtropes. All my favorite movies are in here.
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Oh my God! It's been 6 hours! Where did the time go? This report is due tomorrow morning! FFFFFFFFFFFF
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R&D is testing out a new beverage that makes people better at everything. Seems Copperfield was fed up with paying for ship replacements and ordered R&D...
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...to come up with something to balance out our suck. Initial test results suggest it can make you run really fast.
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Just got a memo from the boss. R&D reports success with their new wonder drink. Powerthirst is to be distributed to all Agents immediately. Time to run like a trackstar!
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Just spent $160 on Contemporary Battles 2. That's $10 more than usual. Booting up now.
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No dedicated servers. FFFFFFFFF WHAT IS THIS I DON'T EVEN
*puts on fedora and trenchcoat* Now I know what sort of community you really are. *walks off into the rain*
Some group calling themselves Anonymous invaded my Myface and posted a lot of obscene pictures on it. Today marks the beginning of my war on Anonymous.
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I've identified the leader of Anonymous. It's some guy named Mr. Fletch. I'm sending the Party Van to pick him up right now.
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False lead. Fletch doesn't know a damn thing. WTF is it with these people? Now I'm finding out Anonymous has no leader. FFFFFFFFFFFF
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Turns out the LSF already has undercover agents monitoring Anonymous' secret communication hub, 4Flan. I'm checking it out now.
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Oh wow this is incriminating. Just look at all these pics of exploding vehicles.
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This is... what is this?
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This is kind of funny...
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Heheh, he's chargin' his lazor. Look at his big red lips.
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What was I supposed to be doing again? Oh well. Must not have been important. This stuff is hilarious! Fgsfds!
*puts on fedora and trenchcoat* Now I know what sort of community you really are. *walks off into the rain*
There seems to be a gross subversion of Parkinson' Law and far too much Peter Principle present in the LSF bureaucracy. All the formerly competent field agents...
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have been promoted to management, and there are rarely new subordinates to fill up the lower rungs of productivity. Workload increases, but staff does not.
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The sheer number of documented Naval warships destroyed by planets is inconceivable. It must be at least one patrol group a day! Is this...
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what Friedrich Theodor Vischer meant when he said, "die Tucke des Objekts" (the perversity of inanimate objects)?
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R&D Division's Department of Paranormal Research is continuing to study the reported sightings of spectral beings known only as A.D.M.I.N.s.
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People have interpreted them as all sorts of imaginative manifestations from leprechauns to Archons of an ancient and forgotten god. However, it is...
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...widely accepted that any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic, and so we believe these beings are aliens, perhaps...
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...from another dimension. We hope to capture one for study. By reverse-engineering their technology, we may finally be able to invent a better microwave oven!
*puts on fedora and trenchcoat* Now I know what sort of community you really are. *walks off into the rain*
Why do planets look so small from space?
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Sittin' at the entrance to Zone 21. Feet on dashboard. Gamer Universe magazine in hand. I think I like this post.
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The Office of Internal Affairs once performed a sincere investigation into accusations of a Liberty Navy conspiracy. We concluded that it could be...
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...chocked up to Hanlon's Razor and people being promoted to their level of incompetence. Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.
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I just realized there's literally a bar on every base, station, and outpost in Sirius. Humanity's priorities never change.
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Perhaps the most expedient path to peace is through exploitation of mankind's universal love of beer.
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The knuckle-draggers at Juneau shipyard think that with a few modifications they can push the Upholder's powerplant output to just over 9000.
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I wish them luck; The Upholder's only good for propaganda posters. Speaking of aesthetics, the wingspan is so wide...
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...a blind man could hit it with a shotgun. It's been derisively nicknamed the Cupholder and Ruptured Duck among other things.
*puts on fedora and trenchcoat* Now I know what sort of community you really are. *walks off into the rain*
Just ended 3 rounds of hell on Contemporary Battles 2. Some Ahole kid kept screaming into the mic during the loading screen for lols.
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Died 30 times. Unlocked new emblem: Pushing Daisies. The only way I can kill people is by sprinting around knifing people in the back.
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Game host automatically migrated to me after suffersn00bspoorly left. People raeged me out of the lobby due to lag. FFFFFFFFFFFF
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I wonder what I would look like with a mustache
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Just saw a relic of a movie: 2012. lol, as if that would really happen. If only they knew the world would end because of Communists from space. Simpler times.
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Just found a new word. I wonder what goaste means.
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AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHFGFGSRGSLHGIFSHDAF:?EN>A<JRHFQOU#)(!@*&RT$@(85YH!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111!!!!!!!
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SGHETHSGKLJNHRSGKLJHEBFKGUWYKJDAGFJQHKDFAHGKJGKA~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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MY EYES!
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Oh God, I have gazed into the abyss, and the abyss has gazed also into me. My mind will never be the same. I'm afraid to dream tonight. ;_;
*puts on fedora and trenchcoat* Now I know what sort of community you really are. *walks off into the rain*
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Why do we wear yellow and aqua? These uniforms are so Fantastic 4. Bring back the black!
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Was about to arrest an insurgent I've been tracking for the last three weeks today when I suddenly blacked out. When I came to, the guy was gone, and...
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...everyone was complaining of experiencing the same phenomenon. Truly an example of Finagle's Law of Dynamic Negatives. I suspect A.D.M.I.N.s.
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LPI broke out another hapless punk's brake lights today. Sometimes it's funny to watch. Other times it's sad. But mostly it's funny.
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Homeland Security Director Deus threw us a surprise office party today to reward our discovery of two Rogue bases. I won the box-shoe race.
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Meanwhile, it seems Lafiel Tarrant was returned to safety just 2 hours ago. Was that still going on?
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People say most of the LSF fly a D4D, which stands for desk-4-drawers. I resent this. Most of us hang around the water cooler all day. No desk involved.
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Walked in on Copperfield playing with his dolls again.
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Just spotted another A.D.M.I.N. here in space! Trying to get its attention.
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Bastard's ignoring me. Let's see how it likes lasers.
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I've somehow teleported 699 kilometers from the Sun. FFFFFFFFFFFF
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Seems to be some sort of barrier everywhere at 700 km from the Sun. WTF? Closed Space... O'Toole was right. The perversity of the Universe tends towards a maximum.
*puts on fedora and trenchcoat* Now I know what sort of community you really are. *walks off into the rain*
